tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post6660996885873957255..comments2023-09-22T07:03:03.280-04:00Comments on The Clarity of Night: Entry #89Jason Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14851992219298316168noreply@blogger.comBlogger27125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-44981643646994188212009-07-29T21:46:43.579-04:002009-07-29T21:46:43.579-04:00Very nicely done. I enjoyed this one a lot. Your w...Very nicely done. I enjoyed this one a lot. Your writing is almost cinematic it's so easy to picture the scene even with so few words. Good job!Jaye Wellshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09407478042834459126noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-1799251147726759252009-07-27T07:58:04.027-04:002009-07-27T07:58:04.027-04:00Now that's the kind of reaction we want! Scor...Now that's the kind of reaction we want! Score one for passion and seizing the moment.<br /><br />Welcome to The Forties Club!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-47656440997523248322009-07-19T23:38:28.985-04:002009-07-19T23:38:28.985-04:00After a second reading I discovered verbs or verb ...After a second reading I discovered verbs or verb phrases that could be used for two airplaines flying or in battle: <br /><br />1. taking (her) off (guard)<br />2. (Allie) challenged (him)<br />3. made (her head) buzz <br />4. He closed the distance <br />5. launched (herself)<br />6. hit the dirt floor <br /><br />In my book you're a top flyer, a top fiver.JR's Thumbprintshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10479324326541901987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-29914050370695837132009-07-19T08:52:46.669-04:002009-07-19T08:52:46.669-04:00It is so hard to make a romantic encounter sound f...It is so hard to make a romantic encounter sound fresh and interesting. You've done a great job with this story.Dottie Camptownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00891885810903269126noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-74018821458093819462009-07-18T04:24:44.703-04:002009-07-18T04:24:44.703-04:00I echo what was said before. I love the innocent ...I echo what was said before. I love the innocent romance of this. Having the warplanes droning overhead was a nice touch - almost a foreshadowing of excitement and lost innocence. Lovely writing.JaneyVhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04951739945670483199noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-282899859391341952009-07-17T17:36:13.658-04:002009-07-17T17:36:13.658-04:00Ah, now this appeals to the romantic in me. Great ...Ah, now this appeals to the romantic in me. Great stuff.Terrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03158421102740382411noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-55346711265815181852009-07-17T14:43:45.829-04:002009-07-17T14:43:45.829-04:00sweet and innocent...loved it.
good work - and you...sweet and innocent...loved it.<br />good work - and you can't help but find the girl charmingEsther Avilahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06840416881970211377noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-4873762689211779502009-07-16T09:17:46.858-04:002009-07-16T09:17:46.858-04:00Thanks everyone for your wonderful comments, feedb...Thanks everyone for your wonderful comments, feedback and suggestions. I'm so glad you're enjoying the story!<br />:-DBebohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01041956386477644351noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-38528909476629176432009-07-16T08:51:03.630-04:002009-07-16T08:51:03.630-04:00Takes me back to those heady naive and adventurous...Takes me back to those heady naive and adventurous times and the various "first" experiences and epiphanies. Thanks for this one.Ranee Kaur Banerjeehttp://www.raneespoems.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-84433492421356599002009-07-16T01:56:06.485-04:002009-07-16T01:56:06.485-04:00Lovely coming-of-age moment in a girl's life. ...Lovely coming-of-age moment in a girl's life. The detail of her granny's sweet blackberry wine against the fancy, impressive label... perfect level of description for the scene. (My only quibble is that someone unfamiliar with wine might not use the phrase "too dry" to describe the puckeriness of "real wine.")<br /><br />Charming and engaging, very black and white movie-ish, classic and innocent.PJDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05028687955957107957noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-37123441071667638412009-07-15T21:52:54.379-04:002009-07-15T21:52:54.379-04:00Puts me in a romantic mood! Loved it!!Puts me in a romantic mood! Loved it!!Chris Eldinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16732006129353079344noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-38182648574776047742009-07-15T09:38:59.718-04:002009-07-15T09:38:59.718-04:00Good story.Good story.BernardLhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09722619048888613647noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-92032521008608034152009-07-14T11:47:24.140-04:002009-07-14T11:47:24.140-04:00Sweet banter, her inexperience with wine a hint of...Sweet banter, her inexperience with wine a hint of her overall innocence.<br /><br />Very nicely written.Hoodiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17616427797201977083noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-84899899866838087932009-07-13T20:03:42.619-04:002009-07-13T20:03:42.619-04:00I want more.I want more.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-21812983011856963102009-07-13T12:24:50.094-04:002009-07-13T12:24:50.094-04:00Wine, bringing new experiences :D Seduction at it&...Wine, bringing new experiences :D Seduction at it's best !!<br /><br />NiceAdishahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06757598390608351897noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-86667225677713983642009-07-13T11:16:49.063-04:002009-07-13T11:16:49.063-04:00Love your opening paragraph. The dialogue really b...Love your opening paragraph. The dialogue really brings you to the present. Excellent juxtaposition. <br /><br />Sweet story.Theresehttp://shoeism.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-83396899252451985592009-07-13T10:46:06.583-04:002009-07-13T10:46:06.583-04:00Beautiful! What a sweet moment!Beautiful! What a sweet moment!Preciehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05071233480999640713noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-2935969237068104842009-07-13T10:32:52.306-04:002009-07-13T10:32:52.306-04:00Takes me back to my youth working on a farm.
Left...Takes me back to my youth working on a farm.<br /><br />Left me with a nice feeling. This story and my youth...;-)<br /><br />Lovely writing.<br /><br /><br />Four DinnersThe Preachermanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10224135811862587701noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-55549644135897442202009-07-13T10:32:03.685-04:002009-07-13T10:32:03.685-04:00Now I think I see why I never was a great seducer ...Now I think I see why I never was a great seducer as a young man...Boonsfarm had an all to readable label!<br /><br />{;-p}<br /><br />I liked this Bebo...for many of the reasons already listed above.the walking manhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10058913927297370740noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-10990235318764823662009-07-13T09:21:05.331-04:002009-07-13T09:21:05.331-04:00Oooohhh!!! This one seems like the second scene to...Oooohhh!!! This one seems like the second scene to my story. :)<br /><br />Needless to say, I totally loved it. And like everyone els, I too am glad that nobody dies in this one. :)Aniket Thakkarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18311954967682696734noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-69859266149990294462009-07-13T07:51:22.092-04:002009-07-13T07:51:22.092-04:00well and sweetly done, bebo :)well and sweetly done, bebo :)laughingwolfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08873675614347328116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-74757601196361075032009-07-13T07:33:01.080-04:002009-07-13T07:33:01.080-04:00Thanks everyone, I'm glad you enjoyed it!Thanks everyone, I'm glad you enjoyed it!Bebohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01041956386477644351noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-36070011875484574262009-07-13T07:10:34.199-04:002009-07-13T07:10:34.199-04:00This was sweet, I enjoyed the set up, the barn sce...This was sweet, I enjoyed the set up, the barn scene, the picnic, and the seduction. I got the sense that it was a first for her in many ways. :-)Catherine Viberthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01354073276671196477noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-62497434513883092362009-07-13T05:45:19.802-04:002009-07-13T05:45:19.802-04:00I liked your opening; the time and place really ad...I liked your opening; the time and place really added that extra umphhh to your story. And I'm glad, so very very glad, that you didn't have the barn physically bombed! Very subtle. Excellent job.JR's Thumbprintshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10479324326541901987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-62269721155751538782009-07-13T05:29:38.362-04:002009-07-13T05:29:38.362-04:00A tale of sweet seduction. Loved it!A tale of sweet seduction. Loved it!Tessahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05233122532137654099noreply@blogger.com