tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post1527683557798911601..comments2023-09-22T07:03:03.280-04:00Comments on The Clarity of Night: Entry #115Jason Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14851992219298316168noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-83883161201117150172009-07-29T22:16:12.531-04:002009-07-29T22:16:12.531-04:00This was a high scorer for me. Your descriptions a...This was a high scorer for me. Your descriptions are beautiful and your voice is very clear. I also appreciate the original take on the prompt. Great job!Jaye Wellshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09407478042834459126noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-25181269064198248842009-07-27T08:29:39.465-04:002009-07-27T08:29:39.465-04:00The ground-away dream. The grass not being greene...The ground-away dream. The grass not being greener. Very poignant. He can't go back. Very original take on the picture!<br /><br />Welcome to The Forties Club!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-4030064644003699982009-07-23T13:27:56.505-04:002009-07-23T13:27:56.505-04:00Thanks to everyone who took a moment to comment on...Thanks to everyone who took a moment to comment on my story. I value the support and encouragement so much. Great stories this time.Dottie Camptownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00891885810903269126noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-59969283558863039442009-07-23T13:22:13.091-04:002009-07-23T13:22:13.091-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Dottie Camptownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00891885810903269126noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-63845578348056179032009-07-23T12:25:09.628-04:002009-07-23T12:25:09.628-04:00Great imagery and you pulled at heartstrings with ...Great imagery and you pulled at heartstrings with me - too true of a story. So sad but so beautifully written. This is one of my favorites.Esther Avilahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06840416881970211377noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-36829497544554783742009-07-21T20:08:13.506-04:002009-07-21T20:08:13.506-04:00You were my Number #1.You were my Number #1.JR's Thumbprintshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10479324326541901987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-10233145216979768652009-07-20T13:01:56.366-04:002009-07-20T13:01:56.366-04:00Dottie - a truly wonderful piece of writing. Gorg...Dottie - a truly wonderful piece of writing. Gorgeous.JaneyVhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04951739945670483199noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-87130134904195039822009-07-18T17:21:49.353-04:002009-07-18T17:21:49.353-04:00Beautifully told. There seems to be real life exp...Beautifully told. There seems to be real life experience -or close personal knowledge-embedded in this one. Sad in some parts. But in many places, rings very true.<br />Well written!Chris Eldinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16732006129353079344noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-88232557596511132712009-07-18T15:08:44.797-04:002009-07-18T15:08:44.797-04:00JR, I've wondered the same thing. Good dialog...JR, I've wondered the same thing. Good dialogue is so much about pacing and in such a short format it's hard to do, too hard for me anyway.Dottie Camptownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00891885810903269126noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-3393071162800071672009-07-18T13:13:33.500-04:002009-07-18T13:13:33.500-04:00I'm just re-reading my favorites, examining th...I'm just re-reading my favorites, examining the writing style, and trying to find the "truth in wine." Absolutely terrific writing and theme here. I'm starting to wonder whether having dialogue, or too much of it, takes away from a flash story.JR's Thumbprintshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10479324326541901987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-25940392139773220412009-07-17T20:15:22.376-04:002009-07-17T20:15:22.376-04:00This is really beautiful. Thank you for sharing it...This is really beautiful. Thank you for sharing it with us.Sarah Laurensonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09252565450452195395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-2335569975242954102009-07-16T18:16:57.409-04:002009-07-16T18:16:57.409-04:00I love the title when you put it together with the...I love the title when you put it together with the fact that the train stopped between stations and he wishes he could reverse time, reverse his decisions. For me, this is very sad because he went from fearing that he was nothing to having it confirmed (in his mind). Very well written.PJDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05028687955957107957noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-88298030139292332052009-07-16T14:43:27.937-04:002009-07-16T14:43:27.937-04:00It's easy to count our blessings after that. P...It's easy to count our blessings after that. Piercing detail.BernardLhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09722619048888613647noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-60086908469155433752009-07-16T13:11:46.788-04:002009-07-16T13:11:46.788-04:00Wonderful writing; your words set the scenes so cl...Wonderful writing; your words set the scenes so clearly and even made me homesick for that rooftop!Terrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03158421102740382411noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-45450979126289731732009-07-15T21:15:38.167-04:002009-07-15T21:15:38.167-04:00I wish I'd said exactly what Hoodie said. Pre...I wish I'd said exactly what Hoodie said. Pretend I did, because I mean it.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-3891332259955977622009-07-15T21:00:23.027-04:002009-07-15T21:00:23.027-04:00Dottie - You nailed it! This one is so right. What...Dottie - You nailed it! This one is so right. What talent!Karenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12003379181294550035noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-2832007152038220132009-07-15T16:02:05.876-04:002009-07-15T16:02:05.876-04:00Excellent piece of writing. A whole new world out ...Excellent piece of writing. A whole new world out there with great characters and strong emotions.<br /><br />Ditto to Preacherman too.<br /><br />Loved the piece. A unique take.Aniket Thakkarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18311954967682696734noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-52103735821349428252009-07-15T11:28:29.621-04:002009-07-15T11:28:29.621-04:00Thank you for the kind comments.Thank you for the kind comments.Dottie Camptownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00891885810903269126noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-11359227280805604562009-07-15T09:41:11.240-04:002009-07-15T09:41:11.240-04:00Wow. A whole different world, a whole different li...Wow. A whole different world, a whole different life, made concrete in so few words. So wonderful and so sad.Preciehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05071233480999640713noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-64863034668910248202009-07-15T09:03:41.328-04:002009-07-15T09:03:41.328-04:00Really great story. I could see it and feel it.Really great story. I could see it and feel it.Catherine Viberthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01354073276671196477noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-63365229614617041892009-07-14T22:12:23.253-04:002009-07-14T22:12:23.253-04:00Even the poor can obtain wine and live in a fantas...Even the poor can obtain wine and live in a fantastically written short story.<br /><br /><br />Four DinnersThe Preachermanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10224135811862587701noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-53317398967158586752009-07-14T19:54:03.997-04:002009-07-14T19:54:03.997-04:00Even those far from home and with little money can...Even those far from home and with little money can scrounge-up enough wine. I like how you've captured Moussa's social status and showed how he must peddle his wares to survive.JR's Thumbprintshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10479324326541901987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-38198289009490434402009-07-14T19:10:58.587-04:002009-07-14T19:10:58.587-04:00This elegant and poignant. A portrait of homesickn...This elegant and poignant. A portrait of homesickness. Nice characters.<br /><br />I really, really like this piece. A lot.Laurelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06120847492230531939noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-2547695228585237012009-07-14T18:59:16.346-04:002009-07-14T18:59:16.346-04:00wow... a totally different take, love it!wow... a totally different take, love it!laughingwolfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08873675614347328116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-52348018911290240222009-07-14T18:28:19.492-04:002009-07-14T18:28:19.492-04:00Everyone else's chances drop a notch every tim...Everyone else's chances drop a notch every time you enter, Dottie.<br /><br />This was rich with emotion and imagery. Very, very nice. Your language is exquisite.Hoodiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17616427797201977083noreply@blogger.com