tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post3394025172157131198..comments2023-09-22T07:03:03.280-04:00Comments on The Clarity of Night: Entry #166Jason Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14851992219298316168noreply@blogger.comBlogger23125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-33490966358598279892010-01-18T19:20:04.971-05:002010-01-18T19:20:04.971-05:00I was going to comment on how good this was, but n...I was going to comment on how good this was, but now am more curious about the proposal within. Please let us know your answer to Nman.Chris Eldinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16732006129353079344noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-87167466490284583392010-01-17T18:57:47.119-05:002010-01-17T18:57:47.119-05:00I'm pretty sure that's the first marriage ...I'm pretty sure that's the first marriage proposal in the CoN contests? Can anyone corroborate?<br /><br /><br><br><a href="http://www.insearchofgiants.com/2010/01/commenting-on-silhouette.html" rel="nofollow">my caveat</a><br><br /><b>Something I Would Keep</b><br><br />Definitely the first line. Stark foreshadowing so grotesquely and effectively done.<br /><br /><b>Something I Might Tweak</b><br><br />Instead of using the asterix to explain "Chacha" you might at one point say "his uncle" which would not be out of place with "his grandfather" "his mother" etc.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-31881828731198877522010-01-17T04:42:01.879-05:002010-01-17T04:42:01.879-05:00Wow...
Could feel the heat and experience the ari...Wow...<br /><br />Could feel the heat and experience the aridity. could see the devastation and ruins. could see the child maybe aware of the destruction but remotely, superficially... could see the mother moving on with her life and her routines...despite the war and all...<br /><br />a child at play... yet the piece is suffused with grimness and grief...<br /><br />do i call this resilience or do i... hmmmn<br /><br />Amazing, anu... I liked this because it is making me think and wonder...Preetihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00279859240371070699noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-45714029446416806452010-01-16T19:31:58.684-05:002010-01-16T19:31:58.684-05:00I'm with Janey. Such a heartbreaking line told...I'm with Janey. Such a heartbreaking line told in a matter of fact tone. This is an excelent look at the ravages of war from so many different angles. Excellent!Sarah Laurensonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09252565450452195395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-67546807831350638292010-01-16T15:33:59.003-05:002010-01-16T15:33:59.003-05:00The backstory is quite tragic, yet you ground it i...The backstory is quite tragic, yet you ground it in reality, in the hear and now, when the mother gets the attention of her child. The setting of this story is excellent.James R. Tomlinsonnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-75065318984969948882010-01-16T10:18:03.115-05:002010-01-16T10:18:03.115-05:00Aijaz was lucky. His carpenter father had lost onl...<i>Aijaz was lucky. His carpenter father had lost only his hands and his mother only one eye and two grown up daughters. </i><br /><br />This line broke my heart. <br /><br />Anu - this is a very moving piece of writing. It is its starkness and honesty that make it so powerful.JaneyVhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04951739945670483199noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-78842172111130075252010-01-15T15:06:10.885-05:002010-01-15T15:06:10.885-05:00Dear all
thanks so much for the kind words..
@ka...Dear all<br /><br />thanks so much for the kind words..<br /><br />@kartik glad that you liked it. I have been reading your blogs for a while.<br /><br />@Ranee I believe that the serious kinds should be dealt with simplest of words..thanks for your nice comment.<br /><br />@pjd ,Deb smythe that one is my fav too:) thanx<br /><br />THANX TO ALL<br /><br />Anu<br /><br />(find my blog at anuchingangbam.sulekha.com )anuhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02132426273901751481noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-14873226306418136472010-01-15T13:43:17.217-05:002010-01-15T13:43:17.217-05:00He's leaving "mice" out for the &quo...He's leaving "mice" out for the "eagle," huh, Anupama? <br /><br />Excellent descriptions and I'm awed by your tone--the absolutely matter-of-fact, even unemotionally mundane way he talks about his father's loss of hands (and thus livelihood) and his mother's loss of one eye and two daughters is priceless!<br /><br />RaneeDr. Ranee Kaur Banerjeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09915043555307038876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-58052908688873280832010-01-15T13:10:49.867-05:002010-01-15T13:10:49.867-05:00Very poignant! +1 on the favourite line! Lovely wr...Very poignant! +1 on the favourite line! Lovely writing, Anupama :)Kartikhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01067636999700672077noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-90459324555264753052010-01-14T17:59:21.510-05:002010-01-14T17:59:21.510-05:00echo Deb. That was my favorite part.echo Deb. That was my favorite part.PJDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05028687955957107957noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-62143899003380250182010-01-14T13:02:32.264-05:002010-01-14T13:02:32.264-05:00His grandfather used to look at the sky for rain, ...His grandfather used to look at the sky for rain, his father for bombs and now he was waiting for the eagle. <br /><br />That's a great line.Deb Smythenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-64708611197205713642010-01-14T03:20:47.172-05:002010-01-14T03:20:47.172-05:00Really shows the resilience of people and in parti...Really shows the resilience of people and in particulare children. Even though Aijaz is in a horrific situation he has normalized and is even goofing off much to his parents chgrin.Craighttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04344917148662934359noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-1198338298614658952010-01-13T15:38:01.514-05:002010-01-13T15:38:01.514-05:00That was some powerful writing here. Indeed a very...That was some powerful writing here. Indeed a very devastating situation shown, but shown brilliantly.lenahttp://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-14963138695692329622010-01-13T14:35:46.850-05:002010-01-13T14:35:46.850-05:00Powerful & moving. The characters nonchalant r...Powerful & moving. The characters nonchalant reaction to the chaos around him paints a jarring picture. I can almost hear the bird & feel a dusty heat.<br />It drives home the point to be thankful for what you do have.RockstarNinjahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16763722140919445834noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-82279427797967719582010-01-13T12:52:26.209-05:002010-01-13T12:52:26.209-05:00Dear All
Thanks a ton for your sincere comments.I ...Dear All<br />Thanks a ton for your sincere comments.I ll definitely try to do better next time.Thanx for the support..<br /><br />(Dear NMan I ll think and tell you.)anuhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02132426273901751481noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-68374810499837965152010-01-13T11:19:59.804-05:002010-01-13T11:19:59.804-05:00Many-layered possibilities for interpretation. Is ...Many-layered possibilities for interpretation. Is he a resiliant boy with a kismet attitude or a child deeply traumatized?<br />Well done.<br /> Only the word "lunch" struck a false and westernized note.Bernitahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05264585685253812090noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-72716615138755236742010-01-13T11:18:51.076-05:002010-01-13T11:18:51.076-05:00Wow! That was awesome! I love it.
It's so...re...Wow! That was awesome! I love it.<br />It's so...real and so gory!<br /><br />Will you marry me?<br /><br />NPallavhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09597178864833810868noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-34820470347303777552010-01-13T10:27:32.651-05:002010-01-13T10:27:32.651-05:00very well written.very well written.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14506215579083565980noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-33919474422665819872010-01-13T09:08:45.484-05:002010-01-13T09:08:45.484-05:00stunningly powerful metaphors!stunningly powerful metaphors!laughingwolfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08873675614347328116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-71459903985688306682010-01-13T08:28:21.133-05:002010-01-13T08:28:21.133-05:00Just awful, and I mean that in a good way. This i...Just awful, and I mean that in a good way. This is just such a devastating situation. Well written, I really got a sense of the generations here.catvibehttp://www.catvibe.net/blognoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-28545730353910108802010-01-13T05:15:38.078-05:002010-01-13T05:15:38.078-05:00well written...theme of conflict between the haves...well written...theme of conflict between the haves and have not is clearly shown...Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11926087220669093885noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-64848680609250636172010-01-13T02:32:28.001-05:002010-01-13T02:32:28.001-05:00The gory portrayal of post war disaster is very we...The gory portrayal of post war disaster is very well written. Horrific.Aniket Thakkarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18311954967682696734noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-65272324982790108882010-01-12T18:36:25.272-05:002010-01-12T18:36:25.272-05:00Brutal.
their entrails showing through their thin...Brutal.<br /><br /><i>their entrails showing through their thin skin</i><br /><br />This sets the tone of a life stripped bare. Very harsh and well written.Laurelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06120847492230531939noreply@blogger.com