tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post7067388899640469362..comments2023-09-22T07:03:03.280-04:00Comments on The Clarity of Night: Entry #174Jason Evanshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14851992219298316168noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-56875323764598340712010-01-18T19:41:05.433-05:002010-01-18T19:41:05.433-05:00Lovely writing, but the missing punctuation got to...Lovely writing, but the missing punctuation got to me, and I'm not a grammarian.Chris Eldinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16732006129353079344noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-13065141248307124412010-01-17T18:02:16.929-05:002010-01-17T18:02:16.929-05:00my caveat
Something I Would Keep
The first paragra...<br><br><a href="http://www.insearchofgiants.com/2010/01/commenting-on-silhouette.html" rel="nofollow">my caveat</a><br><br /><b>Something I Would Keep</b><br><br />The first paragraph. It's amazing, effective, fresh, with a great hook and wonderful metaphors/references.<br /><br /><b>Something I Might Tweak</b><br><br />I wasn't sure of the intention of using periods or not using them.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-47449104640778939912010-01-16T13:13:05.809-05:002010-01-16T13:13:05.809-05:00You did a fine job with word choice here and lead ...You did a fine job with word choice here and lead me to believe there was a loss of child.James R. Tomlinsonnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-18778464743964233422010-01-16T13:03:57.470-05:002010-01-16T13:03:57.470-05:00Thanks for all the feedback
I wrote this in a fla...Thanks for all the feedback<br /><br />I wrote this in a flash moment, in appr. 4-5 minutes.A.Silvestrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09298384512375722679noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-56767672353910593842010-01-16T12:27:37.346-05:002010-01-16T12:27:37.346-05:00A secret memory hidden in their heart to be kept s...A secret memory hidden in their heart to be kept safe for always.<br /><br />I also found this proundly beautiful and moving. I wonder if it was a child they lost and that this is the place where they conceived him. By coming back the memory opens the trapdoor into the soul allowing them to grieve.JaneyVhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04951739945670483199noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-42142715137066840032010-01-15T12:51:41.554-05:002010-01-15T12:51:41.554-05:00Very powerful, emotional and tragic as well! You&#...Very powerful, emotional and tragic as well! You've captured loss so poignantlyKartikhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01067636999700672077noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-36804799281924699822010-01-15T02:15:26.624-05:002010-01-15T02:15:26.624-05:00Hardhitting emotion at it's best.Hardhitting emotion at it's best.Craighttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04344917148662934359noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-63283901422062131002010-01-15T01:06:28.020-05:002010-01-15T01:06:28.020-05:00Once again, Laurel and Bernita said my comment bef...Once again, Laurel and Bernita said my comment before I could arrive. Nicely done.PJDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05028687955957107957noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-50916461218999774022010-01-14T10:52:10.252-05:002010-01-14T10:52:10.252-05:00Pretty prose.
I'll have to do a reread for fu...Pretty prose. <br />I'll have to do a reread for full understanding.Deb Smythenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-61763926581689274692010-01-13T15:21:09.775-05:002010-01-13T15:21:09.775-05:00A very powerful writing. I still am under impressi...A very powerful writing. I still am under impression of the last line. Sad and beautiful.lenahttp://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-75193809706324965102010-01-13T15:14:17.270-05:002010-01-13T15:14:17.270-05:00a poignant story of love and loss. so well depicte...a poignant story of love and loss. so well depicted. i am amazed by the 'foot in her soles imprint'. absolutely amazed. <br />"this is us as we conceive"...<br />Oh God... some of the lines in this piece have gone and stamped themselves in my brain.<br /><br />I simply loved this.Preetihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00279859240371070699noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-70429810407156771192010-01-13T07:44:58.861-05:002010-01-13T07:44:58.861-05:00The descriptions are exquisite and the mood is pow...The descriptions are exquisite and the mood is powerful. I read it three times. The story was confusing in that I really didn't understand it, it left me wanting to understand it though. Very poetic.catvibehttp://www.catvibe.net/blognoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-34990417396398021702010-01-13T05:19:48.161-05:002010-01-13T05:19:48.161-05:00Powerful, moving, deep and beautiful.
"I neve...Powerful, moving, deep and beautiful.<br />"I never cried. If I cried, I would lose him forever." <br />Waves/tears.The fear that tears - the usual surcease of grief would wash away his memory, his essence.Bernitahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05264585685253812090noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-57702947976438417572010-01-13T03:42:06.355-05:002010-01-13T03:42:06.355-05:00A very sad and touching story. The last line hit m...A very sad and touching story. The last line hit me hard. So much said in there.<br /><br />Thank you for this.Aniket Thakkarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18311954967682696734noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15498010.post-21914019900257719462010-01-12T21:30:26.481-05:002010-01-12T21:30:26.481-05:00This merits a couple of extra reads. Fantastic des...This merits a couple of extra reads. Fantastic description, amazing first paragraph.<br /><br /><i> Waves thundering towards eternity, carrying but a slight hint of sunblock and almonds vaporized from our bodies. My foot in her soles imprint</i> carries me to the beach with them.<br /><br />Did they lose a child?? That was my take.Laurelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06120847492230531939noreply@blogger.com