Thursday, June 22, 2006

Entry #7

"Fishers of Beasts"
by Emeraldcite

Some of us were sent out to be fishers of men, but there are those sent
out to be fishers of beasts.

Azazel, one of the Grigori, the Watchers of Men, had fallen and
revealed the art of sword making. Now, he stood at a corner smoking a
cigarette, his dark hair matted against his forehead, hawking cheap guns.

"Men shouldn't fight," I said.

"We're not men, are we?" He stamped out his cigarette.

"It's never too late. I've recruited many and they believe this too."

Azazel laughed through a deep cough.

I smiled. "Not as well as we used to be?"

Azazel pulled a .45 from his vest. "These are not mortal bullets, my
friend. These are consecrated with the secrets of our kind."

I slipped a hand inside my coat and brought out a small piece of chalk.
I knelt and drew a circle around my feet, marking symbols in each of
the cardinal directions.

Azazel erupted into another coughing fit and squeezed off a shot. When
I didn't react, he fired twice more.

I tossed a small white card outside the circle. "Call me when you
change your mind."

Azazel picked up the card, squinted at it, and tucked it into a pocket
on his vest. "Don't count on it."

He tore off down an alleyway.

Some were meant to be fishers of men, but I am a fisher of beasts
because when I look up at the midnight sky, I see home.


Jaye Wells said...

I like the paranormal angle.

Jerilyn Dufresne, author said...

I always enjoy a story that leaves me with questions. Tidy endings are boring. Your piece was definitely not boring. Good job. Jer

anne frasier said...

wow. loved it, emeraldcite.

Chandra Rooney said...

Reminds me of a Constintine mixed with Good Omens. Nice.

emeraldcite said...

Thanks everyone!

Flood said...

Will this be part of something larger? It's intriguing.

emeraldcite said...


Thanks! After finishing this piece, I was considering making it something larger...i might expand it into a short story or perhaps something bigger. Depends on how the characters develop.

Thanks for showing interest, it might be the inspiration needed to take this idea to the next level.

The tough part was cutting it down from 400 words. I think I lost a few good lines, but it gained quite a bit from the cut.

Jeff said...

Very good, Emeraldcite!

emeraldcite said...

Thanks Jeff!

Hey, when do we see your piece up here?

Anonymous said...

Very intriguing plot!

emeraldcite said...

Thanks Jim!

Scott said...

Yes, you certainly have started something here. You gave just enough to get the reader interested. Good stuff.

Bhaswati said...

So intriguing. I like the writing style. Thanks for sharing.

Melly said...

Oh, good stuff!
Gripping, interesting, flowing.
Enough information on the mysterious part without being tedious or overwhelming the short piece.
Very well done!

emeraldcite said...

Scott: Thanks! I've started doing some expanding. Maybe it'll become something someday!

bhaswati: Thanks!

melly: I really enjoy the challenge of flash fiction. It's like watching a really good commercial on television.

sometimes, the commercial is more interesting than the show you're watching.

Kelly (Lynn) Parra said...

Great job, emeraldcite. I'm intrigued!

cesarcarlos said...

Intriguing. Reminds me of Prophecy. Nicely done.

Jade L Blackwater said...

Indeed - well done! I love your main character.

emeraldcite said...

Thanks everyone! This has been an enjoyable experience.

Anonymous said...

Emeraldcite, the triumph of this piece extends beyond the confines of flash. Even though the words end, the story goes on. We sense that, even if you never write another word for this story. Technical use of language at its best. A high scorer.

emeraldcite said...

Thanks Jason!