Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Entry #90

Hungry like the Wolf
by Paul Liadis


“I’m so lame,” Scott thought to himself as he stood staring at the sky, noticing the moon as it peeked through the clouds. It had been months since Scott started attending the werewolf “mixers”, and in that time he had yet to even talk to a member of the opposite sex. Suppressing the urge to howl, so cliché, he continued down the lonely path in the woods to the old wooden cabin.

Waiting for him outside the party was his best friend Ron. Ron had been a werewolf much longer than Scott and always seemed to know what to say. Ron’s advice to Scott regarding women was to “be confident”, but Scott could not for the life of him see what he was to be confident about.

“Excellent! Two chicks for every guy,” said Ron as the two friends entered the cabin, which smelled a combination of hair, smoke and alcohol. Basically, if a drunken dog caught on fire and wound up at the party, no one would have batted an eye.

Scanning the room, Scott caught the eye of a particularly curvy brunette. “Go get ‘er,” said Ron, nudging Scott not-so-subtly in the back.

For what seemed like the longest walk of his life, Scott approached the brunette hoping desperately his walk wasn’t as awkward as it seemed.

“Hello,” offered the young lady in a voice that surpassed her looks and suggested to Scott more than chit-chat.

“Nice beard,” mumbled Scott, realizing it would again be a lonely night.

13 comments:

Joni said...

Hands down THE funniest entry! I laughed out loud through the entire reading. EXCELLENT! Way to look at the social side of being a were. Last line had me literally belly laughing. My hat's off to you.

Unknown said...

A guy's got needs, even if he's a little different.
Unfortunately, he also has standards. . .

Very nicely done!

anne frasier said...

i laughed out loud when i got to werewolf mixers -- and i didn't stop laughing. this was great, paul. pure delight.

Anonymous said...

That was laugh out loud funny, Paul. Great read!

Anonymous said...

Now that's a different take on things. Very nice.

Anonymous said...

Thank you all so much for your kind comments. When I submitted this I wasn't sure what the reaction would be, though I hoped people would at least get a chuckle.

Paul

A. M. said...

Werewolf mixers. That did it. Jesus. Don't howl, that's so cliché. Werewolves have self-esteem-issues, too?

I'm still laughing.

Anonymous said...

Too funny!

anna said...

I am laughing so hard!! What a treat to start my morning this way.
Excellent excellent excellent.
Wonderful post.

Roberta said...

What a great way to start my morning! This is hilarious!

"If a drunken dog caught fire and .." Great line!

Thank you for a true and hearty laugh!

Dafath said...

very funny

a

Anonymous said...

Congratulations on your well-deserved win!

Anonymous said...

OMG, I'm laughing out loud!! What a great ending. Nothing like putting his paw in his mouth. Highest marks overall.

Congratulations on the Honorable Mention!