When she's not locking horns with Satan and all his mischievous minions, Church Lady's blog is definitely a social hot spot. This time, Evil Editor is the guest of honor (God help him). This Thursday, January 24th, Evil Editor's book, Novel Deviations 3 will be released.
That means one thing. Par-tay!
A little known fact is that Evil Editor is especially fond of petting zoos. Here, he's feeling like a bit of a jackass for forgetting to bring quarters for the feed dispenser.
Just outside the frame, a ram is lining up on that tender behind. I could share that shot, but I'm feeling merciful this morning! (But seriously, ain't that donkey cute??)
In the meantime, we can play a little party game. Using the next letter in the alphabet, give us a little random memory sparked by that letter. I'll start with the letter "A" in the comments.
27 comments:
Arrhythmia. When I was a teenager, I volunteered in the ER of a local hospital (I wanted to be a doctor). Many nights were boring, so I entertained myself by reading a book about interpreting electrocardiograms. One night, I helped transport a patient up to the Intensive Care Unit. The woman had a heart monitor on her, which I was watching in the elevator. Suddenly, I saw something very wrong. Third degree heart block. I thought I must be wrong until I saw the RN's panicked face. Afterwards, we talked about it. Something must have been wrong with the hookup, because you don't last long with third degree heart block. Crisis narrowly averted.
Next person spark a memory on "B."
I wanted to be a doctor, too, Jason. And then I got to medical school.
B is for...basketball. I played in high school, and our team made it to the district championship. I was just a sophomore, but I was a great (if I do say so myself) free throw shooter, so the coach stuck me in during the last two minutes. Sure enough, I was fouled. Two points behind, one minute left, and I had the chance to tie the game.
I made one. We lost.
Maybe I should have posted this under H...for humiliation. ;)
C- Creamed Corn. When I got married my mom gave me a big box full of canned goods to get us started in our new apartment. One was a can of creamed corn, which up to that point I'd never had before. One night I opened up the can of creamed corn and a can of pork and beans and served it to my husband, who promptly mixed them together and ate it. I've had difficulty even looking at creamed corn since.
D - Dinner. I hate thinking up dinner ideas. Always have. If I sat around all the time, bon-bonning and frou-frouing, maybe I wouldn't mind.
Oh, who am I kidding? Yeah. I'd still mind.
I just want the dinner fairy to let me know what time dinner will be served, and what he'll be serving.
Electric Avenue: When I worked at weekly entertainment newspaper in college, one of the editors decided to try out at amateur night at a local men's strip club for his column. He showed up in a nun's habit, jazz shoes, and a pink spangled g-string. His chosen music was Electric Ave. by Eddie Grant. The editor was so drunk by the time he got on stage, he started a pushing match with the other contenders. He did not win.
F is for Fronton.
In fourth grade, I loved to write books. You know, the kind you make and then fill in with stories, and as you go the letters get bigger and bigger and bigger until you've got like six words on a page just to fill the damn thing.
Anyway, my best books were about my trips to visit my mom in Las Vegas during the summers, and one of my favorite things to do was to go watch (and bet on) jai-alai at the MGM Grand's fronton. I'll never forget the atmosphere. Like a dog racing track, only dark and not as crowded. What a great time for a ten year old!
Goat
When I was about ten years old I was in a fenced-in barnyard with a goat. The beast had little horns and a big attitude. It chased me around and around for what seemed like hours. My father was outside the fence laughing. (did I mention I grew up in a dysfunctional family?)
By the time I scrambled over the fence, my heart was racing and I was officially terrified of all goats.
H - Hula Hoop
When I was young my dad owned a car dealership in a tiny town. One summer as a promotional event he had a hula hoop contest to see who could keep the hoop spinning the longest. I came in 3rd, but it was a distant victory because the 1st and 2nd place people went on forever.
Indecent - I was once indecently proposed to by another man, whom I had met in the woods by chance.
Jury - When my youngest was still a toddler, I was called in for jury duty. On Wednesday, I was placed on a jury. The case turned out to be in juvenille court. Two underage kids had a baby and after about two weeks, the baby was taken away from them by the great state of Oklahoma. Turns out the injuries inflicted on the child happened during a very difficult birth. By this time, the baby had been in foster care for 18 months. We gave the baby back to the parents. The mother, no more than 17 or 18 years old, bawled like a baby and stood by the jury box to thank each and every one of us as we left. It was heartbreaking.
K is for Kite Runner - my favorite book of last year which made me cry like a baby. And I just saw the movie which was not as good as the book but still very well done and also made me cry like a baby.
Sarah, I went into college premed and came out a Latin major. Sorry about the basketball game! The whole team bore that loss, though.
Hoodie, wow, that really does not sound appetizing. Aine and I had some scary first meals too (often made by me, so I'm not blaming anyone).
Robin, that's where planning ahead saves some angst. ;)
Jaye, sounds like Electric Avenue might have led straight to the police station. Yikes.
PJD, welcome from the EE party! Wow, betting on jai-alai when you were ten. I guess they weren't too strict on carding in that place. ;)
Church Lady, now that's downright cruel! Them goats is nasty!
Anti-Wife, were you in any commercials? That would've been cool. :)
Scott, oh man. I hope you ran very fast. Not even Forrest Gump fast. Like The Flash kind of fast.
Kaycie, that's so heartbreaking. It just goes to show you that rules, no matter how well intended, can go wrong. The law errs on the side of protecting kids, and thereby sometimes harms them.
Ello, oh yeah, that book was rough. I was bleary-eyed at the end. I'm not surprised that the movie didn't live up to expectations.
The next letter is "L!" Any takers?
Liposuction.
I had liposuction done 3 years ago. DH and I were going through a really bad period, and it was the most impulsive thing I've ever done. I charged it on his card and wanted to make myself skinny for the next man, whoever that would be. Now DH and I are happy again and I've filled in what liposuction sucked away.
(Curse your alphabetical therapy! I probably have something humiliating for every letter!)
:-)
Like the wind, my friend.
"M" is for Mariposa Folk Festival. We went every year when I was a small child. It was held on Center Island in the Toronto Islands. My sister and I danced with Indians in big headdresses, chewed on licorice sticks, wore ponchos that had been crocheted by our Mom, listened to folk music and loud rock and roll, played recorders and tambourines, coralled other kids and climbed up into "the Coca-cola tree" that we'd marked by sticking a crushed Coke cup in the bark (it had low branches, so even the small kids could get up into the tree), and basically ran wild with a whole lot of hippie dippies. Walking to the last ferry late at night, we'd all sing songs in a great big winding snake of people, sometimes in the rain.
Mariposa was wonderful.
b
N - No. On occasion, my favorite word, except for the years I had toddlers and they used it on me. Over and over again. It's a toddler thing, and it's a gene pool thing (in my family), so my girls possessed a double dose of no-ness.
And then, for a while, things were calm and full of yesses. And then they became teenagers. Yeah. Life is a cycle.
(BTW, Jason- planning dinner a week ahead isn't any more fun than planning them nightly. It still requires thought-thinking-thought, and I'd rather not. I'm actually a pretty good cook, but I don't care. I like being waited on.)
O - Oatmeal bath. Aine and I met in college, and I was visiting her home during the summer. While we were walking down a country road, I spied a wild apple tree in a field. I LOVE wild apples. As I made a beeline to climb it, Aine said, "um, I think that's poison ivy all over that tree." I grew up in a cooler part of Pennsylvania (temperature wise, clearly), and I had never seen poison ivy. I think I doubted that the mythical plant even existed. "Nah," I said. "That's not poison ivy." Aine didn't argue the point.
Ooooh. After the blisters, rashes, hives, Calamine lotion, and suicidal tendencies, I figured that I might very well have been mistaken....
P for Panic - I am usually quite calm, but when someone new to our house, not knowing about the RULES, enters the room with his dirty shoes, I immediately grab a vacuum/wet sponge or both and with my bare hand, feel for the tinies molecules of sand/dirt.
Q
Vivian's favorite scrabble letter. DH and I played her every week while we lived with her as renters. She and DH were very competitive. We kept a file of scoresheets and had three or four dictionaries on hand.
When DH and I married, Vivian sold the house to us and moved in with her sister. Shortly after, she passed away.
At the funeral, DH placed the Q into the casket. He also gave her the X.
We hope she's getting bingoes wherever she is...
R is for...Rachel Carlson. I never picked up A Silent Spring until I worked at the zoo one summer in my early twenties. It was such a fun job (except for the bear poop barrels...but that's another letter ;) ).
Anyway, while working in the aviary, a Rachel Carlson tape ran continuously on loop, and I became a big fan of her environmental advocacy. She was revolutionary in her time and has such a legacy today.
S is for "shat". Love that word. No one uses it anymore, but as the past tense of "shit", it sounds so gosh darn elegant! I mean, if I were at a high class cocktail party, I really think I could laughingly say, "My goodness! I almost shat myself a fortnight ago!" And I truly think it could sound almost... well... charming.
Or perhaps I'm full of shat? :)
Angelique
Church Lady, glad you two came out of the crisis stronger. Sorry that the lipo didn't stick, though (or the opposite of stick).
Scott, glad you dusted him!
Bekbek, great to see you! Sounds like a time when you were taught to be a free spirit. That indeed was a gift.
Robin, being waited on is definitely far more cool. As for the "no" stage...yeah, that was a drag.
Szelsofa, okay, it's a shoes-off house. I'll remember the rule!
Church Lady, that's an unbelievably sweet story. There's a special place for people who befriend an older person out of no obligation. I'm smiling for both of you.
Sarah, I should read A Silent Spring. Considering the culture of her generation, her efforts are even more remarkable.
Quoibler, somehow, being full of shat sounds perverse. It's like keeping a bunch after it's come out. Yum. ;)
T - Trying...trying to think of another word to help Jason's idea get all the way to Z. Or at least through T. So my word is: trying.
In the spirit put forth by Robin, here's another letter even though it's my second time round.
U is for umber hulk.
Hey, you said a "little random memory." This is both little and random, for sure.
Anyway, as a kid I was a total Dungeons & Dragons geek, and when we ran into our first umber hulk (it's a type of monster), I learned that umber was actually a color. Who says D&D isn't educational?
Robin, and I appreciate the effort! Thanks for "trying." =)
PJD, ah yes. The old Dungeons & Dragons days. I played a bit when I was 12 - 13. Some great adventure memories from that time. Then, I moved, and my new found friends were not quite, um, creative enough to play. The game did require a certain IQ. 'Nuff said.
Vermillion. I went to basketball camp with a girl named Jan Vermillion when I was about 14. She had short blonde hair and was a forward (I was a guard, and this was six-on-six ball). I didn't know her, I'm not sure I ever even spoke to her. But I always wanted her last name. Vermillion is such a gorgeous word and such a stunning shade of red.
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