Monday, June 26, 2006

Entry #27

"Atonement of Atomes"
by K. Lawson Gilbert


on that dark day
of the crucifixion
the sky opened up
and the moon
illuminated our sins

was it sweat or blood
that ran that day
was the altar marble
or pale cold skin

why still the darkness
creates our shroud
that hangs off beaten bones
and stirs us to awaken now
as undivided atomes

we were electrified
by an Ionic Savior
his words in us were charged
did not we feel them
stirring in our wombs and
burning in our hearts

we lost an electron
on the midnight road
but in our souls we keep
electricity to light the way
and tears of blood to weep.

[K. Lawson Gilbert was raised in the hills of West Virginia, an area rich in folklore, legends, and superstitions. “The hills and hollows were my muse,” she says. When she was five years old, she wrote a poem about a cardinal sitting on a snowcapped bush. Her mother made her recite it to every passerby. After all these years, she still sees the world as poetry, and still writes about what she sees. She is a teacher, poet, and writer and lives in Centermoreland, Pennsylvania.]

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Loved the poetry. That's a talent I think I will probably never acquire. :)

Anonymous said...

Jim, thanks for your kind words. You may not write poetry per se, but you are a poetic writer.

Bhaswati said...

but in our souls we keep
electricity to light the way
and tears of blood to weep.


What beautiful words! Thanks for sharing this.

Anonymous said...

Bhaswati,
After reading your lovely work, I relish your comment. Thank you. KLG

Scott said...

I like the mix of science and religion here.

Anonymous said...

Scott, I appreciate your insight.
I have always been an epistemologist AND an existentialist. So, I am sort of a mixed breed myself.
;-)

Anonymous said...

I appreciate your comment, since you write so well yourself. This poem is great.

Anonymous said...

Of all the entries I've read, this is the most evokative. Great imagery. Well done!

Would love to read more of your poetry.

Jade L Blackwater said...

It's great to read another piece of poetry. I like how you bring together the past, the present, and the mythological.

Anonymous said...

"was the altar marble
or pale cold skin"

This line will stick with me until I die. It is so resonant.

Visually, symbolically, everuthing -- I think you tapped into the collective unconscious with that one!

Excellent.

Anonymous said...

My gratitude to all who took the time to read and/or comment. I am primarily a poet, so after viewing Jason's excellent photo, this poem just came out and "stayed out." LOL (I had no say in the matter)

Linda, thanks for the praise.

Sue, you have paid me a high compliment. I would be happy for you to read my poetry.

jib, That was my intent, so I am glad it worked. Thanks for insight.

Elisha, your comments made me draw in my breath in surprise. It is a good feeling to be able to write something that people will remember.

Fran Piper said...

I love the extended metaphor. Great mix of technical excellence with feeling.

I will never write good poetry, but I can certainly appreciate those who do!

Anonymous said...

Fran, many thanks for the encouraging words. I loved your entry, too. It was so creative the way you characterized the lineman...like a livewire!

There was such a wealth of talent here.

Anonymous said...

K., the passing of electricity is intriguing. The gift of the savior lost, then changed to illumination. Nicely done!

Anonymous said...

Jason,
I appreciate the time you took to comment on my poem.

Thanks for the insight and for understanding what I was trying to convey here.