Sunday, February 24, 2008

Entry #31

Sweet Escape
by Rachael


The cool winter air chills her face and makes her already tired body ache with pain. She's almost there but it's a hard journey. She had no choice but to escape from the imprisonment that she has been locked up in for months. When the opportunity to run away arose, she took advantage and escaped through the woods.

Armed with only a hooded sweatshirt and her wits, she makes the trench through the forest. The branches on the trees scrape her skin, her heart beats rapidly with adrenaline, and her eyes tear with all of the sadness she feels inside.

She lifts the opening on the bottom of the fence and crawls across the muddy ground until she reaches the other side, freedom. All she sees is open land with plenty of opportunities.

She runs through the grass, ecstatic with excitement. She views a small farm house in the distance and a huge tree on the property. As she runs, her lungs burn, her body is soaked in sweat but she carries on. Finally she arrives to the farm house and asks to use their phone.

Freedom is so close, she can taste it.

Within an hour she will be captured and back in the imprisonment she escaped from, but for now she will dream of freedom and its possibilities.

If she only knew what awaited her maybe she wouldn't have run away.


[Rachael is a book reviewer for various websites online. She enjoys reading thrillers, mysteries, paranormal, chick lit, and fantasy. When she’s not reading, she also enjoys watching movies, organizing her book shelves, going to flea markets, going shopping, drinking coffee, and spending time with her amazing fiancé.]

17 comments:

Remiman said...

The secret is to always leave them want more.
Well done!
Now; more ;)
rel

24crayons said...

I really like this, I wonder now what awaits her upon her return!

DBA Lehane said...

Oooh the intrigue - a prison, a school, an institution, a family, a lover? The possibilities are endless!

Absolute Vanilla (& Atyllah) said...

Wonderful intrigue and strong imagery - this is another one of those that I'd like to see more of.

SzélsőFa said...

I wonder what/who greeted her within that farmhouse...why was she imprisoned back again?
a well written story with lots of questions...
yes, more, please.

Gnewvegan said...

Very nice. It indeed left me wanting to turn the page...

BernardL said...

Well thought out tension and suspense.

bluesugarpoet said...

Very mysterious! I was left wondering what she escaped from and who was in the farmhouse that would take her back to her "imprisonment." Freaky!

Sarah Hina said...

So close! I wish she had made it. But it makes a better story that she didn't.

Nicely told!

pjd said...

Nice imagery on the running and the farmhouse.

RachaelfromNJ said...

Thank you so much for all of your wonderful comments!! I am so glad everyone liked it. I am shocked at all of the posts!! Thank you, thank you!

JLB said...

I agree with Remiman - there is definitely more story to be told here.

Aerin said...

I say we fit all the stories together into one long story, so that this protagonist is running from zombies, also...to the guy with the computer at the top of the hil....

Or not.

Fun piece, good pace.

RachaelfromNJ said...

Too funny! That would be hilarious to see all the stories put together into one. I saw the big open field and automatically thought of someone running through it..

Thank you to everyone for your feedback. :)

wrath999 said...

I enjoyed the ambiguity of this piece. gives the readers a chance to use their own imagination. great job

jason evans said...

The exertion of the escape is well described. I probably don't want to know what will happen to her.

Aine said...

Somehow I think there's a twist lying in wait.... I want to know more!