Monday, July 14, 2008

Entry #38

Squamata’s Rumble: Certain Results of Biker Attitude
by KJ Hannah Greenberg


Johnny was a good boy. He regenerated his tail in champion time and made sure to eat both leaves and flies. Day’s off, he obeyed the speed limit, usually.

Summer’s sensual airstream had tickled him awake, moaning gust and heat, in turn. He had tried to ignore that tempestuous summons, willing each of his limbs to sleep, concentrating only on the smell of jasmine and aloe buds, counting the scales on each of his clawed feet. The warm season, unhurried as a sated cockroach, endeavored otherwise.

A new zephyr puffed at him, introducing enticement by first name. Squamata approximated a groan and reached for his goggles.

Lean in body, dexterous, and fleet, Johnny was the sovereign of the merpesset tetrapods, his taunt centimeters assuring mortality for other leaseholders. Only July’s breeze ever beguiled him away from his chopper-earned safety.

Johnny listened. No one else was chirping or whistling. No one else had donned gloves.

Again, the puff of air became insistent. Johnny swallowed, subconsciously, flicking out his tongues and then retracting it to his vomeronasal organ. No other chasse had been mounted. Eagerly, Johnny reached for his cruiser.

Counting himself down, Johnny leapt over the rail, his short neck sailing Earthward before his tail hit orbit. He surpassed his best elapsed time as well as his best terminal speed, his thirty foot free-fall toward cement having been fueled by those lusty atmospheric gases.

So marvelous was his sprint that Crows did not pick up Johnny’s pieces until morning.

21 comments:

Wannabe Writer said...

Interesting use of the prompt. Was your main character a lizard? -Rita

Scott said...

Very interesting. At times it had a jabberwocky feel to it, eliciting images instead of literal meanings.

klgilbert said...

Clever take. Like your creative writing style.

Sarah Hina said...

Very unique interpretation. I loved this lizard's cavalier spirit. :)

I enjoy writing that leads me into an unfamiliar world. You accomplished that here. Well done!

*~*{Sameera}*~* said...

Biking through the eyes of a lizard,very innovative :)

Nice descriptions!

hannah said...

Wannabe Writer: Yup, he was every bit a squatama. I have been fascinated with such critters for a while. See the middle section of:
http://cgis.jpost.com/Blogs/joy/entry/rhetorical_strategies_and_ambitious_wildlife_pt_ii
Thanks for your encouragement.

Scott: Thanks. My kids think I'm an uffish bandersnatch, especially when I assign them chores. In the not-too-dark corners of my office, I get back at them by writing speculative fiction. See:http://typeamom.net/teens/ceramics-without-teens.html

klgilbert: Thanks. Here's a spot to find a another piece of my recent flash fiction; http://tuesdayshorts.blogspot.com/2008/07/middle-eastern-transport.html

Sarah Hina: Carpe Diem! I suppose when you have such a brief life cycle, relative to us bipods, you can take more risks. ;)
Thanks for your feedback.

Sameera: Thanks for your kind words. I appreciate that the folks reading the entry are able to enjoy its language. In my home, my kids merely point out that I wrote yet another story in which someone or something is being killed off. Sigh.

JaneyV said...

An Evel Knevel Lizard - cool! I loved your writing - the language was brilliantly weird -really enjoyable and such an imaginative take on the photo!

SzélsőFa said...

I was surprised to see the world at a lizard's perspective, but why not? A very interesting take on the photo, great job.

Aerin said...

I agree with Sarah - in 250, you did an astounding job of leading us into another world. I didn't have the "huh" type response at the end because you did such a good job explaining what was needed and not explaining what wasn't. Brilliantly weird, indeed!

hannah said...

Janeyv: Thank-you for your affirmative words. I'd like to think that us humans are not so unique in our inclination to perform outrageous stunts. Besides, I always though you had to be a bit "cold-blooded" to be a daredeveil. ;)

Szelsofa: Thanks for your compliment. Now, if only we could see what the crows saw....

Aerin: Bwa-ha-ha. It is my twisted pleasure to provide readers with odd, unusual and uneasy sensations. Thanks for your support.

September said...

what a cool lizard and smart too, what better way to get a mouth full of bugs than on the bike. Cool ending too, not that he died, but that last line. I love it.

The Grocer said...

Very original and very well done.

Dottie said...

Great use of language and a pitch perfect voice. Great tale.

hannah said...

September: Johnny was so macho that he ate his bugs RAW! If only his photo album had survived....
Thanks for your upbeat comments.

The Grocer: Thanks. By the way, 'love your nom de plume!

Dottie; Thanks! Unlike our little reptile pal, I can't do wheelies off of balconies, but I sure do appreciate your praise.

'ya all: Pick me! pick me!


Jason: thanks much for hosting! I'm enjoying the comments as much as I enjoyed writing the flash :)

While I threaten to bite any family member who dares to enter my sanctum when I'm composing, I sincerely appreciate the chance to ping-pong on a piece in public (say that quickly three times and you'll need a soda).

Charles Gramlich said...

A unique take on the challenge. Very funny, but well written.

angel said...

oh NO! my favourite genre and you killed him!!! i love this!

laughingwolf said...

had me from the beginning, well wrought....

Missy said...

Entertaining and educational - scientific names and all! This was thoroughly enjoyable and imaginative.

hannah said...

Charles: Gosh, thanks!

Angel: Killing off helpless, scaly creatures "before breakfast" delights me. In all seriousness, I think lizards are cool.

Laughingwolf: I appreciate your kindness. Thanks.

Missy: I've found that "good" fiction sits on top of fact. Often, I make an effort to "research" my topics. Thanks for noticing.

jason evans said...

Very avante garde. I could see this as a futuristic/wacked-out cartoon.

hannah said...

Jason:

Do you sketch? I write.