Sunday, July 12, 2009

Entry #73

Prodigal Son
by CharlesProgrammr


It was merely a glass of wine. Someone during all of the gaiety of this celebration of Alan's return had misplaced it, setting it down and forgetting where, likely fetching another upon realization of misplacing it. It wasn't likely more than 4 ounces of wine, less than a single ounce of alcohol.

Alan had been away from the family for 3 years, had not spoken with any of his family or his old friends. He remembered the glorious taste of the wine when he first sipped the glass, the first of half a dozen. Alan was the prodigal son come home.

He remembered drinking in the sight of Amanda--beautiful Amanda, who had been his, even until he went on his 'walkabout' to find himself. Amanda, who had given herself to him on the beach one evening after the pair of them had split a bottle Alan had stolen from his parents' liquor cabinet. She seemed to still be in love with him, clinging to him as he climbed into his car to leave. He was wondering about the child seat in her car, distracted when the bicycle's lights popped up as he crested the hill. Alan's reflexes weren't the best after drinking, and he really should have waited until most of it had cleared his system. A screech, then a large oak.

A single glass of wine, red, lighter than the red that now flowed from his body. A glass as deadly as any poison to a recovering alcoholic.

15 comments:

Chris Eldin said...

Happens way too often. I wondered what happened to Amanda...
Nicely written.

JR's Thumbprints said...

I like the fact that the wine was nothing but wine, yet deadly.

Sarah Laurenson said...

Love the child seat. Little details that fill in so much story. Good job!

Catvibe said...

The MADD people would be happy with you for this entry. A sobering truth about alcohol, and well written.

laughingwolf said...

nasty stuff, booze...

Laurel said...

Nice development of his internal arguments and I'm with Sarah on the details. The whole vignette feels very real,like it happened to someone who knows someone I know.

Mona said...

I love this story. It has a lesson to teach every alcoholic. The child seat speaks volumes of what could have been and what was lost...

This story has a deep pathos about it...It throbs with a multiple succession of feelings , of loss and regret, of the price one has to pay for what appears to be a meare bad habit.

The summing up is exceptional I love the allusion to the red wine to blood. The last line is the crescendo to the entire piece.

Excellent Entry!

Therese said...

I liked the ambiguity in this piece. Apt title. Nice job.

joaquin carvel said...

this is some skillful storytelling - loved the drinking of the wine, the "drinking in the sight" - and the last 2 lines are poetic.

Aniket said...

The little details gave this piece its meaning... Liked it a lot.

This reminded me of one of the best 6 word fiction pieces I've read: "Baby shoes. For Sale. Never Worn"

pjd said...

I was all ready for him to kill his own child at the end, but the ending you chose is so much more palatable.

JaneyV said...

Sad and truthful. I took love the little details. I like that you have just unfolded the piece and not actively judged Alan - leaving the reader to make of it what they will.

Anonymous said...

Beautifully done. Left me with chills, and sadness for what might have been.

Tara

Jade L Blackwater said...

The whole story feels lubricated and detached... effective.

jason evans said...

Poison indeed. I hope he makes it. I want him back with Amanda.

High marks for pacing.