Monday, May 10, 2010

What If, Would You?



"What if you just got paid. Would you spend your paycheck on fireworks?"

"Yes."

"Would you shoot them off that same night?"

"No."

"Would you invite me over?"

"Yes."

"Do you have matches?"

"No."

"Do you smell matches before you strike them?"

"No."

"After?"

"Yes."

"Do you like red wine or white?"

"Red."

"Is red wine sweet?"

"No."

"Must you drink table wine on a table?"

"No."

"Would you drink wine when you shoot off your fireworks?"

"Yes."

"If one of the fireworks landed in my hair and it was smoldering, would you tell me?"

"Yes."

"Would you put it out with your bare hands?"

"No."

"Would you pour the wine over it?"

"No."

"Would you swat it out with your paycheck?"

"No."

"Would you light off more fireworks?"

"Yes."

14 comments:

Chatterbox said...

Loved it :)
Very nice!

Keep 'em coming Jason :)

Mona said...

so much can be revealed of a person's character by the staccato yes or no answers!

This is an amazing piece!

Karen said...

...think I'd be finding a new friend!

Tabitha Bird said...

I'd pour the red wine over it. I can't drink the stuff! :)

Great writing as always Jason. Loved your comment on my blog btw. :)

Bernita said...

I read that as Date Fail!

catvibe said...

I thought maybe date, but then I thought maybe young child with unceasing questions. :-)

I've been a terrible blogger lately. Should I blame it on general INFP flakiness? No. It's Spring! Outside WAY more than in. I finally got back to read the rest of Seed. Whew! Excellent. Sister Moon is also finished now for your reading pleasure.

Laurel said...

Hmm. Someone who will waste neither wine nor skin cells protecting my coiffure. Prudent, but somewhat lacking in loyalty.

This was curious and funny. I love the "yes or no" answers in the dialogue!

....Petty Witter said...

To quote Alice In Wonderland - curiouser and curiouser. What a lot you learn from a simple yes/no answer. Do I like wine? No. Do I like fireworks? Yes. Would I put out flames with my pay cheque? No, I'd grab somebody's wine.

Meghan said...

Another awesome piece!

Oddyoddyo13 said...

Hehe, very inquisitive.

jason evans said...

Chatterbox, I should do more really bizarre things here. Not just the mildly weird.

Mona, I think this is the third What If, Would You piece that I've done. I have to say that I've developed a real liking for these two.

Karen, wise, very wise.

Tabitha, but not the white wine or the tequila, right?

Bernita, ha! Yes!

Catvibe, I agree. Spring is way more important than stopping over here. Glad you enjoyed the rest of SEED, though! Early on, you warned me that I'd better finish it.

Laurel, I'd go for the hand, myself. Skin heals, after all. And it's the fastest intervention.

Petty Witter, now that's the right approach! Why deprive yourself of your glass when someone else's is right within reach?

Meghan, thank you kindly!

Oddyoddyo13, it's bizarre, yes.

Martha said...

"Would you bring a fire extinguisher??"

"Yes."


Thank you for your comment btw, love the phrase, "gun and guts report", perfect!!

jason evans said...

Martha, ah, see, there you go. You'd be the brains of the operation. :) You're welcome for the comment!

Aniket said...

Well the answers were totally logical Captain. :)

"Did you like this piece?"

"Yes"

"Do you like the format?"

"Yes"

"Are you satisfied already?"

"No"

"Would you like Jason to keep 'em coming?"

"Yes"