Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Forties Club Finalist #67

The Waiting Game
by Gef Fox


I hate dogs. I never liked them before, but tonight it's official: I f---ing hate dogs.

He isn't even mine. Some kind of bulldog--ugly as s--- too--that Marty won at a card game. Marty should out here walking this thing up and down the beach. But no, I've gotta do it.

Why Marty even kept it after he won it, I'll never know. He's never owned a dog before. Hell, he can barely take care of himself. If he wasn't so good with locks, Chaz and I wouldn't even need him.

Why the hell didn't Chaz put his foot down and tell him to leave the dog when we picked Marty up? We're just lucky it didn't start barking up a storm when he hit that old man's house.

This wouldn't even be an issue if they hadn't gone back in to grab that damned flatscreen. They dump the loot in the backseat and say they'll be right back, meanwhile I'm sweating bullets behind the wheel just waiting for the cops to roll by.

And since when does a dog eat jewelry? Did he think it was puppy chow?

I didn't even know a dog did that kind of thing. And the balls on Marty to say I pocketed the jewels while they went back inside. Now, just to prove myself, I have to--God, I hate dogs!

How long does it take for a dog to s--- twenty grand worth of diamonds anyway?

17 comments:

Joni said...

Delightfully funny take on the prompt. I like it.

Oddyoddyo13 said...

This was different, haha.

Aerin said...

Nice set-up, entertaining voice.

Peter Dudley said...

What Aerin said. The frustration seeps through. Nice, nicely done.

Dottie (Tink's Place) said...

Hi Gef

hahahahaha! I love the dog, diamonds, and the thought that all things come to pass.

Nicely done, enjoyed your take!

Dottie :)

Laurel said...

I am hooting with laughter! And also sympathetic. I've done my "doody" inspecting the remnants after they have made the rounds.

Great take on the prompt.

Erratic Thoughts said...

Hahaha! I thoroughly enjoyed his frustration!My sentiments exactly...

fairyhedgehog said...

I really laughed at the end of this. I like it that the main character is unsympathetic enough that I could laugh at his misfortune. Serve him right!

And I'm still smiling.

JR's Thumbprints said...

You could sense the frustration in the narrator's voice. If it weren't for their friendship, I'm sure the narrator would've gutted the dog. Very original. Two thumbs up.

Shona Snowden said...

Great tone, funny story, good work!

JaneyV said...

Your opening sentence nearly killed it for me but I'm so glad I read on. I love humorous pieces and this has got the lot. Well done Gef!

I love dogs!

Meghan said...

LOL! A great piece. I love the humor!

Rabid Fox said...

Thanks to everyone for the kind comments. I had a helluva time trying to come up with something decent to submit,and the deadline was looming. Then, I got an odd bit of inspiration to write this one up.

Something very different from what I usually write.

Now, I must spend the weekend reading everyone else's. :)

C.Sonberg Larson said...

Hee Hee. Totally cool take on the prompt. Me likey.

McKoala said...

Very funny!

Deb Smythe said...

Ha! Well, if you have to curb your dog, make it worthwhile.

AidanF said...

Fun story. I loved the line "did he think it was puppy chow?" Dogs know fear. This captures it perfectly.