Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Beer Philosophers #11 - Absolute Zero
"Do realize you've been staring at the bottle opener for ten straight minutes?"
"Oh, you turned. That's good. You heard me. At least I know you're alive."
"Do you want to lay down or something? It freaks me out when you sleep sitting up."
"I was thinking."
"About absolute zero."
"It's the temperature when all motion stops."
"I feel like you embrace the state of absolute zero often."
"Think about it. Stillness…. Stoppage... Nothing at all, man. "
"Actually, you're wrong."
"No I'm not."
"No, really. Absolute zero is when all thermodynamic energy stops. Quantum motion within the atoms themselves never stops."
"See, there you go again. I'm the parade, and you're the rain. Why do you hate me so much?"
"Dude, I don't hate you! If the truth is out there, the truth must be spoken."
"You have a point."
"Wisdom, my friend, catch it. It's contagious."
"I'll tell you what, I'm going to be the first person in the history of the world to reach absolute zero. It's just a matter of discipline. Control."
"Dude, like I said. I've seen you there TONS of times."
"It just takes right breathing. The right focus. See? In…. Out…."
"Give me that bottle opener. You want another beer?"
"You know, I think absolute zero is horrible, really."
"Just imagine the work to keep it. The smallest particle hitting you…the smallest amount of energy…the smallest, most inconsequential force applied, and BAM, you've got heat."
"It would like be trying to play king of the hill on a lump of mud. You'd spend the entire time scrambling back up after slipping off."
"I could stay cool in space."
"Nope. No good. Background microwave energy left over from the big bang would warm you like two degrees."
"Give up the dream, man, for your own good."
"But I aspire to perfect nothingness! Don't try to tell me I can't get there!"
"Man, I swear, if anybody can do it, you can."