Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Late Train
Sitting in the train station after the crowds are gone. Late. Dancing with the casual predators.
The brief eye contact. I see you. I see you.
Come at me, and I just might take you first.
Sometimes the loneliness sticks like a second skin. Especially after the wine and my performance and the forced laughs. The people I'm often with are a crowd of footprints right past me.
I'm not sure I even want to be seen here anymore.
Perhaps it's better that way. Tonight, the train may be full of people like me.
I'll close my eyes as the stations freeze in the window.
Let me pretend.
It's better that way.
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15 comments:
I especially like "casual predators" and "crowd of footprints." Very evocative.
I've only been at a train station once when it was empty. You are so right about the term casual predators. I felt like opportune prey. Nothing happened, but a very creepy feeling all the same.
Wow, this was terrific Jason. I'm enjoying a re-read to savor your words. Photo was great too. G
www.mypoeticpath.wordpress.com
I feel there's more to it, some hidden story behind, but I can not really see what that is.
Anyway, I liked this psychological little piece.
Very evocative piece Jason. Those late night commutes were one of the things I hated when I worked in London. It's all there - the eerie quiet, the over-loud echoes, the vulnerability and unease. I love the line
I'm not sure I even want to be seen here anymore.
Actually I loved all the lines - that was just the loneliest.
Loved the way this flows, with truth behind the words, that tell a story....
I see you. I see you. But they're those glancing blows that make people step back, and not forward.
Slipping away...the engine of our thoughts moves faster than trains. I wonder what that person beyond the concrete is thinking?
This piece connects with me in many ways. "Loneliness sticks like a second skin," "I'm not sure I even want to be seen," "It's better that way." It's meloncholy, yet there seems to be a little spark of something else. Hmm.
While I'm here, I'll pathetically grovel for comments on my latest blog post. It's not much of a contest if you've only got two contenders for the prize. :0
love this picture Jason -- feels like you're looking down a long tunnel -- and the feel of your words makes one think "is that light at the end of the tunnel the train?"
great stuff!!
A different life you have led me into: one of which I am unfamiliar.
Thanks for the view.
Chris, the Philadelphia train stations are populated by many interesting characters at night. It's good to be straight, and to the point.
Geraldine, I had another post planned, but I was inspired to pull out the cell phone and write this piece after attending a function after work in the city.
Szelsofa, yes, it's just a glimpse. In a way, I saw extra value in that.
Janey, yes, you know these moments. You described it effortlessly. Thanks. :)
Stacey, sometimes the loudest words are between the lines. Thanks for listening. :)
Sarah, I've felt the sting of these moments before. This time, I was inspired to share it and be heard.
Hoodie, you are very perceptive. There is an unextinguished spark there. Thanks for seeing it. And I'll be sure to stop over!
Bev, the cell phone camera is very limiting, but I kind of like the ability to snap a picture anywhere. This one turned out.
Goatman, thank you. I look forward to having the same opportunity from you.
Excellent piece, Jason. I know these feelings... you've brought them out so well...
Thought-provoking post, indeed!
Thanks for Your visit :-)
When I first got the ducks the two males were going at it for dominance--the typical male past-time. Bully boy would chase spotts around and around the duckpen to keep him away from the two females. They have since traded dominance places and now it is spotts who does the chasing. The eggs seem to end up fertilized though as we will soon see when roxie hatches hers. Pictures to follow.
Hi Jason, it's been a long time since I stopped here (no reflection on you, of course) but it's easy to see why I enjoyed it so much before. This piece is terrific. The loneliness, the way it molds to you is so heavy and tangible. Love it.
Vesper, during train rides like that I fall asleep. After I wake up, I appreciate how many of those feelings get left behind.
Anna-lys, sometimes we just feel like we're not where we're supposed to be.
Goatman, it must be fascinating to watch the interaction of personalities.
Kathie, I'm very happy that you stopped back and got a little something to tuck away from your visit. I hope you've been well. :)
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