Thursday, July 10, 2008

Entry #5

Childish Things
by BernardL


“C’mon, Aaron, slow down!!”

“Look, Rena, no hands!” Aaron shouted, taking his hands off the handlebar grips.

Rena nearly crushed Aaron’s ribcage, shrieking so loudly, Aaron hurriedly grabbed the grips, allowing his cycle to coast. Wind noise and RPM decreased to the point Aaron could hear Rena’s labored breathing. He felt her warmth, where Rena pressed against his back so tightly, she seemed a part of him. Aaron eased to the empty roadside, with only blackness all around them. Flipping on the hazard lights, Aaron turned the engine off, and rocked the cycle powerfully up on its rear stand. He covered Rena’s hands with his own.

“I’m sorry, that was stupid,” Aaron took off his helmet, hanging it over the left gauge, and looking up at the night sky. He inwardly cursed his unthinking act. Sounds in the black stillness washed over him: sounds of life.

“I…I’m pregnant,” Rena whispered, still clutching Aaron.

Aaron broke free, lurching off the seat. He grabbed his wife up into the air, whirling her away from the seat. They had given up all hope of being parents.

“Things will have to change,” Rena giggled happily in Aaron’s arms.

“I’ll put the cycle up for sale tomorrow.”

“You will?!”

“When a child, I played with childish things. When I became a man, I put childish things behind me,” Aaron paraphrased the old line, undoing Rena’s helmet and tossing it aside. Aaron’s lips covered Rena’s gently, at first, and then with a growing need and urgency.

28 comments:

Sameera Ansari said...

That was really sweet and romantic!

Sarah Hina said...

Oh, this one filled my heart. :)

In such a tender moment, his recklessness was put behind him. Wonderfully described--the love and euphoria really shone through.

Loved it!

Chris Eldin said...

I love your metaphor of the ride of life being in front of them. Playful and romantic...
Very nice!

JaneyV said...

So sweet! Bernard, I love the romantic thread. I'm glad you showed Aaron to be a sensitive soul before Rena told him about the baby. It made his joy all the more believable.

Sounds in the black stillness washed over him: sounds of life.

I really liked this line. I don't quite know why but it makes me think of the ocean.

Nice one Bernard.

wrath999 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
wrath999 said...

Amazing how quickly one can grow up. From living like there is no tomorrow to looking at things for the long run. Aaron just like the rest of us (I hope)

Great job

Anonymous said...

I think my comment got deleted. Ack. To sum up:

BRAVO.

Charles Gramlich said...

Very nice. Great ending. Looks like we both wrote one for the ladies. ;)

BernardL said...

Thank you all for the feedback, I really appreciate your taking the time to comment. :)

Anonymous said...

I love the romantic nature also. Also the message of finding out, and accepting, one of life's biggest and most important transitions.

Beth said...

Very nice and romantic. I really liked this one as I actually kind of lived it. Thanks for letting me revisit the past.

Bernita said...

What they said. Sweet.

Anonymous said...

Good for Aaron! Love when guys step up to the plate....even in fiction.

Esther Avila said...

Ohhh....I loved this.
Very good job, Bernardl.
I like the way she whispered it, and his reaction to it.
The ending so sweet too.

BernardL said...

Thanks for the very nice comments. :)

Lena said...

so sweet! and really cute from the beginning till the end!

24crayons said...

I want the rest of the story!!!

This was great and romantic, I liked that.. it made me want more.

Anonymous said...

Now there's a MAN. Well developed character that you allow the reader to watch and feel 'come of age'. Great pacing that keeps the reader's interest from start to finish. Very well done.

Scott said...

Whoa. When my first child was born, I parked my motorcycle and never rode it again. I can't bear the thought of dying, but not the thought of leaving my children to fend for themselves. I guess I'm not the only one.

BernardL said...

Thanks again for the wonderful comments. :)

raine said...

From boy to man in a moment.
Very romantic, very good, Bernard. :)

BernardL said...

Thanks, Raine. :)

laughingwolf said...

very sweetly said, bernard...

Vesper said...

The others have already said it, but I have to repeat it: it's beautiful and romantic. Very nicely written, Bernard. I really liked it!

Anonymous said...

I agree with the others. The story is so sweet and romantic.

BernardL said...

Thank you, laughingwolf, Vesper, and pernille, I appreciate your commenting. :)

Aine said...

Love the title! It proves to have several layers.

I could feel their joy as I read. Ver nice!

Anonymous said...

Nice use of the ride to punctuate a vital change in their lives. The end of one life. The arrival of another.