"Castle Keep"
By Forrest Landry
Jolts of pain shot up Don's arms as he slid down the electric cable to the old castle. It was so dark he couldn't even tell when he was close to the wall. Then a crack in the heavy clouds gave him just enough moonlight to see he was about to smash into it.
He kicked his legs up and brought himself to a halt. The weak lunar glow showed his hands just inches from the other line. If he moved wrong, he'd be fried.
Still, there was space to reach up and grasp the pipe which ran across. He hoped it would hold, then jerked himself up and inward.
The pipe held. He clambered up over the ancient stones and stood on top. The faint light limned the rotten wood decking just below.
"Lousy maintenance," he thought.
A sharp gust threatened to topple him. Now pissed, he grabbed the rod standing up from the crenulations.
"Come on, there's GOT to be a way to get in there."
The clouds didn't help, closing tightly and shutting off the moon.
"Well, no time like the present. Charge!"
The ancient crone standing in the dark window across the inner courtyard waved her fingers. One snap and lightning struck the rod, searing Don's membranes into chitterlings.
He didn't fall, just stood there, burnt to a crisp.
"Did you get a charge out of that?" the old woman asked.
[Forrest writes stuff. He makes stuff up. He blogs at forrest-landry.blogspot.com and has a web presence at www.lulu.com/forrest-landry. In his spare time, he tends two old cats and a kitten who acts like she's on methamphetamines. ]
Friday, June 23, 2006
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17 comments:
Ha! Now I see why you commented on mine that you got a charge out of it. Funny ending. (Yeah, even death can be funny.)
By the way, I have on my "I Make Things Up" T-shirt today.
Very punny, Forrest. You sure are a live wire. Hair raising story. Too hot to handle. Etc.
:D
Heh, amusing and entertaining.
Electric prose! Shocking end!
It's clear my punny self has come to a shocking end. That was just the mood I was in last night when I went through and commented...all over the place.
Glad you liked the story. Now if I could only figure out how to do that for 80,000 words. I'd have another novel.
Forrest, shockinly entertaining and funny - but burnt to a crisp? LOL ewww.
by the way, Jer, I love my "I make things up" t-shirt!
Got a jolt out of this! Good job.
Nothing like light dark comedy. Good job Forrest. Looking forward to your interview on Flood's blog.
Ah, death humor. Gotta love it.
I have to agree with the others. It was shocking yet funny. Very well done.
HHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Yeah, MG - you DO find bizarre shit funny. Well, it was one hellaciously funny story. Snap Crackle and Pop!
Thanks to everybody for your truly wonderful comments! I REALLY appreciate them ALL!!
Came here to enjoy some electric therapy -- after doin' overtime rusing deadlines, as always with a journo. But didn't laugh to death...nyet.
HA! Needed a good chuckle and you hit the stop. Very funny.
That's supposed to be spot. Need to learn to proof-read.
Wonderful imagery!
Forrest, I like the setup of the moment. The random gust, putting his hand on the pipe. Better than if it was choreographed by the crone. Also, loved "Don's membranes." High marks in entertainment and storytelling!
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