Sunday, July 29, 2007

Entry #27

Predator
by Jeff Neale


She watches the massive yellow beast as it sits motionless in the darkness. It is a predator, but different from her. It sleeps openly through the night with no need to hide, for it has no natural enemies.

Its presence both angers and frightens her.

Even now, the scent of humans lingers heavily near the beast, for they ride upon its back as it builds its gigantic nest of trees.

With the coming sun the humans will arrive and awaken the beast again. The sky above will darken with clouds of its black foul breath.

It roars in triumph each time its powerful jaws uproot a tree, moving it as effortlessly as she moves a twig in her nest.

She would proudly fight against the destruction of her home, but what weapons has she against such a beast?

She cocks her head and her talons flex on the dark branch beneath her. Her eyes, sharp as a laser, lock in on a slight rustle under the leaves below.

Tonight, while the beast sleeps, she will feed.

Perhaps tomorrow she will take wing high above the shrinking canopy of leaves and search out another place to nest, another place to feed.

It is the way of things, and once more she will adapt. She and her young will thrive. At least for a time. . .until the humans arrive upon another yellow beast.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ah, very original, very subtle - I liked this a lot!

SzélsőFa said...

I had to read twice to understand what kind of yellow beast it was. Oh. It's a very interesting idea to look at things like this. I'd like to read a longer version of the same story :)

Bernita said...

Well done, Jeff.

Anonymous said...

It took me a minute to understand the yellow beast, then pow, the whole story fell into place. Great flash, Jeff!

Anonymous said...

You did an excellent job of maintaining the depth of understanding to the birds' POV. Great read, Jeff.

Anonymous said...

You did a fantastic job on this one. I like how you gradually come to understand what the beast is, without you explicitly stating it. It allows you to feel some of the confusion that the bird is feeling.

apprentice said...

Yes it a great bird's eye view. Nice job.

Pallav said...

Hey man, your and mine stories have many similarities, a bird and a yellow beast!
ha ha, keep it up, mine is entry 49. :)

Good one!

N

Unknown said...

Great story and a unique angle - well done, Jeff!

Anonymous said...

Very poetic and original--bravo!

Jeff said...

Thank you all for your kind comments.

Anonymous said...

Another yellow beast! This idea must be resonating - well done Jeff.

Anthony Rapino said...

Very cool. I liked this a lot. Very original too.

Jeff said...

Thank you JLB & Onipar.

briliantdonkey said...

REally like the bulldozer as a beast point of view. nice job Jeff.

BD

Anonymous said...

Well paced and carefully handled. The sense of survival is expressed well.