Monday, January 12, 2009

Entry #64

Little Wing
by Selma Sergent


The scarred part on my wrist throbbed as the trains trundled past. The skin grows over the wound but it doesn’t make you forget why it’s there.

I looked at the tracks. Hot metal smell like burning fat. I imagined myself falling, being crushed under the power of the machine. I saw a disposable cup blown to safety by the speed of the train’s passing. What if I was light enough to be blown to safety?

I couldn’t risk it.

So I headed for the roof. Twenty storeys up. Once you were falling from that height, you kept falling. No chance of a reprieve.

The escalator gave off a blue sheen. The colour of the centre of a match flame. Everything was different in this light. Faded 8mm film. I wondered how the critics would review the ending.

A little girl on the down escalator waved at me as we passed, both at exactly the same point for an instant, neither down nor up. ‘It’s a moving staircase,’ she said. Quaint, unexpected turn of phrase.

I turned around and saw her getting on my escalator. Going up. She had on a long blue dress with a pale blue sash. All dressed up.

I alighted, opening the door to the fire escape and freedom. She was behind me, shuffling up the stairs.

‘I’m lost ,’ she said.

She held out her hand. Such a small hand, gentle as a wing. My resolve shifted.

‘I’ll help you find your way,’ I said.

24 comments:

Lena said...

I guess in the end it was the little girl who helped her find her way. Liked your story, it really shows the picture without saying much.

peggy said...

A wee guardian angel, very nicely done!

harshad said...

just in time..great read!

Ello said...

Oh I loved this! Well done!!!!

JR's Thumbprints said...

I like stories where the character that needs help ends up helping someone else. Makes your character genuine, important.

BernardL said...

Uplifting tale with a hint of hope for the future.

laughingwolf said...

superb! :)

*~*{Sameera}*~* said...

Awww that was beautiful!A God-sent angel indeed :)

sawan said...

loved it!

Catvibe said...

An angel indeed.

Sarah Hina said...

Great turn-around, Selma. Since he's tried suicide more than once, I might be tempted to believe her intervention is short-lived. Then again, maybe this little wing is the start of something bigger. Focusing on others is a great start.

Very effective descriptions, along with the emotional resonance. Well done!

Lauri said...

Excellent writing, Selma.

Rebecca Livesey said...

great story, with lovely bits of descriptive detail thrown in

McKoala said...

I love this one; great description too.

lissa said...

now that I read it again, I'm thinking the narrator could be a man, but I guess it's all in how you interpret the piece

Geraldine said...

Beautifully written Selma! Definitely will be on my list of reader's choice pics. Bravo.

Jennifer said...

This is really nice. A hint of Sylvia Plath with slightly more hope.

JaneyV said...

This is so sweet. A little lost angel to pull you back from the edge of despair - giving you purpose and a reason to live.

Beautiful.

iLL Man said...

Loved it. Fine twist at the end. =D

ceedy said...

Very nice story....when needed help comes from all corners....

Senorita said...

nicely done ...:)

bluesugarpoet said...

Wow - i really liked how you've turned this one around! Another great testament to hope found in the most unlikely places and at the most unlikely moment. Beautifully written!

jana

Margaret said...

Enjoyed this very much...

How desperate a person can get.

but then fate sends a little angle in a long silk dress to give you a second chance in life.

jason evans said...

Great job with technical skill, storytelling, and voice!

Thanks for being a wonderful part of the contest!