Monday, January 11, 2010

Entry #111

by Mystico

Murder: 1. unlawful killing of a human being intentionally
2. a group of crows
The men trekked through the thick bushes into the clearing, laying their backpacks upon the ground, keeping all senses alert for any poachers that commonly haunted the area.
Fools. After the massacre, you dare to show your filthy faces? We have been waiting. A long time.
“Did you hear? Mrs. Pennyson just got a new coat. Again. Made of dove feathers. Pure white feathers.”
“As long as a market exists for them despicable people and their despicable deeds, no rule in the world will stop them. We don’t have the clout to stop this murder.”
What do they know, of despicable acts and deeds? Men are all evil, and they all do evil acts. But today will be different. Today the only murder will be yours.
“Look at them go!”
“Indeed, the most beautiful sight in the world is when birds of a feather flock together.”
Punish one, and we send a message to the rest. Then we punish them all.
“I’ve never seen so many at a time!”
“God bless us. They are flying so thickly I can’t believe it. Darn it where’s the camera…”
Strike hard, and strike fast. These fools carry no tools.
“Who blocked out the sun?”
The birds descended.
The beating of black wings and merciless caws drowned out the screams as crimson spatters flashed past the sable, cruel eyes.
And the birds shall inherit the earth


Bernita said...

Murderous rage does not discriminate between the guilty and the innocent.
Well done.

Aniket said...

It would have been much more enjoyable if you had followed Jason's request for the formatting. But a great take on the prompt none-the-less. Its only a matter of time they hunt as back.

onipar... said...

Nicely done. i enjoyed the brutality :-)

Lena said...

Very well done, indeed!

laughingwolf said...

mystico rocks!

pjd said...

The crows will have a heck of a time trying to create a society without humans that will feed all those freeloading, no-account pigeons. I say, let them inherit the Earth. See if they can run it any better.

austere said...

So believable.

Loved that black cloud of crows.

Laurel said...

Pete: You have to stop. My keyboard can't take any more coffee.

Hitchcock flashback! Creepy.

Four Dinners said...

Horrifically marvellous!!!!

Kartik said...

Yeah I was reminded of the Hitchcock movie too! Very nicely written!

illyriataylor said...

Amen. We should be so lucky if birds did inherit.

catvibe said...

Pete is funny! hahahaha! But I digress. This could happen. Sure, I think it could. My mother and I took a road trip once, and we decided to follow our 'crow voice' and go where 'the crow called' seriously, we did that. And so, reading this I can't help think of that, because your crow's voices in italics are diabolical. Nice job there. As I write this, my cat is talking to a crow who is invading the bird feeder not 10 feet from me. And this is not just any crow, he's a gigantic crow, surely bigger than my 20 pound cat.

Craig said...


JaneyV said...

Mystico - great work in building the tension. I like the juxtaposition of the murderous thoughts of the crows with the well meaning intentions of the men.

Of course if crows start going on a murderous rampage the usual response of humanity is to hunt them down and obliterate them...

Mystico said...

Sorry for the late reply to your fantastic comments, been rather busy for the past week...
@Bernita:Exactly...which is why we have stellar human examples in Hitler, Alexander the Great, Napolean etc.etc.etc.
@Aniket, onipar, Lena, laughingwolf, austere, Four Dinners, Craig, JaneyV:All I can say is thank you so much for your compliments!
@pjd:To be sure, it's not really up to us to judge how birds should run the earth...the only thing agreed would be wouldn't be better for humans XD
@Laurel, Kartik, Catvibe: When I saw this picture, I had thought of the film "Birds" immediately...and I'd agree with you that it is indeed a great source for inspiration!

james r. tomlinson said...

The birds seem to be the barometer for all living things, as if they'll be the last to go. Interesting format choice.

Kurt Hendricks said...

I must admit I toyed with the dual meaning of 'murder' when brainstorming for an entry, but I'm glad I didn't go with it, as there is no way I could have done better than you have. Good stuff!

Chris Eldin said...

Plausible. Very plausible! Enjoyed your take on the prompt!

Aerin said...

my caveat

Something I Would Keep

Fools. I seriously see Mr. T transmorgified as a crow. I like it.

Something I Might Tweak

"who blocked out the sun" seems a little forced, cliched