Silhouette
by Christopher Mitchell
The sky over Devil’s Courthouse is leaden. The snow is a few hours off and the wind is whipping. I am not sure why I did this hike. I just had to get away for awhile. And I knew my message was here. I was at loose ends and really did not have a clue why.
“The view from up here is amazing.” I thought as I finished my sandwich. As I pulled on my pack, I look over the cliff. A hawk is hovering a hundred feet below my perch. The slow pulse of his wings and ease of his gliding impress me. What little sun there is shines off his dark brown feathers as he slowly rises to my level.
As the bird rises, a voice comes from somewhere. “The snow is temporary. The sun is real. Come and join.” I wonder where it had come from. Every time I have come to the Courthouse, I always wonder if it is my time to be judged. Lord knows, I have sinned much. Would this be the day of reckoning? I step closer to the edge of the precipice. And I notice that I now have feathers.
I can join my brothers in the sky.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
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24 comments:
Liked the descriptions. The fact that you were perched above the flight of the bird, watching it glide, is quite an appealing visual when imagined. Nice. :-)
Also liked the stepping over the edge outcome. was it an inevitability?
Nice imagery. A very well created picture.
Don't know if the stepping over is a blessing or a mistake for your characyer though.
nice story, I also liked the descriptions.
Nice!!!
I liked the progression and the fact that the hike had some purpose. I just hope his wings were fully formed before he jumped from that precipice.
I was prepared for the jump not that there could be a happy ending. :) Great!
Does that mean, I'll get wings once I reach hell too? Awesome!
You just made my day! ;-)
There can be great danger in great beauty.
Love that he has come here before and not gotten the wings. But he keeps coming back.
echo Aimee. I like the description of the place and the hike. I know a place like that, but without snow, where you can stand at the top of a cliff and see the birds circling below. It's very cool. I'm kind glad I never found I had feathers, though.
The Jumper's cousin.
The devil's courthouse...what I would pay to be there!! :)
Amazing ending.
Mithun Mukherjee.
To heed a calling! Lovely!
weird, but likable...
This is a frightening compulsion told beautifully.
Must admit I didn't expect that ending...
Very nice.
A frightening compulsion indeed...unless he really had gained wings!...Then a magnificent way to end!!!
Very well written!
Love the symbolism. Great writing, as well.
Nice courtroom drama. Where else would the Devil's Courtroom be? Your choice of setting is logical.
A literal calling. Nice read!
Well, I think your character here has a little problem of recognizing the difference between fantasy and reality. I am seeing him lying on the ground under the cliffs and it isn't pretty. But it is certainly a fantasy that I've had, especially when on a cliff looking down at the birds gliding on the air currents. I'm left with a deep curiosity about the Courthouse. Would love to know more about that...
Thank you so much for the kind comments.
For those who asked, The Devil's Courthouse is near Brevard, NC in the Pisgah National Forest. It can be acceessed at Mile Marker 431 on the Blue Ridge Parkway. It has always been a source of inspiration for me
my caveat
Something I Would Keep
Something I Might Tweak
Dear Entrants #1-105,
I have read your pieces so that I can fairly participate in the Readers' Choice vote. (I read all of them through last week, before I started commenting.) I will be coming back around to offer my keep/tweak comment, but I didn't want anyone to snark.
Cheers,
Aerin (#236)
BTW, it's perfectly fine if you still want to snark, but this way you can choose a more appropriate subject, like the Golden Globes or those wretched Old Navy dummies.
i liked the flow of the story and the character. i think the end is sad, yet inevitable. i liked the 'calling' as a theme.
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