(Serial fiction, sci-fi)
Just joining us? Go back to Part 1.
She saw light.
At least her brain registered light.
She watched it, but it didn't mean anything. Light. Not light. Halos between the two. You must be conscious of a thing before it has meaning.
She blinked, and the light came and went. But this time, she felt the blink and connected the squeeze with change in the light.
The concept of distance hatched. A sense of close. The beginning of me, and a sense of not me. An observer and the observed.
She watched the light sharpen and become curious colors. There were designations for those differences, she knew, but her brain forgot the concept of words. Not "red" and "green" and "blue." Just this one being different from that one, and both floating higher in her mind than the third.
The third color was sky and water, but the images drifted like husks. Disconnected, wordless dreams. All was new, haunted by the ghostly tinge of familiar.
She squirmed and felt confined. She coughed, and her lungs felt thick and wet.
The coughs turned to gagging. She expelled globs and struggled to move. That's when the explosive seals blew. SEED4611's hatch flung to the side, and metal clanked on the floor.
She sat and gasped a breath of air. The immense importance of that first breath, and all the hours of training anchored onto it, finally sliced the veil over her sleeping consciousness.
She jolted.
The information hit her like a light in a dark room.
She was an Eve Officer on a Second Earth Elopement Device. The S.E.E.D. program. The fact that her hatch blew meant that the pod had landed without her help. Or aborted. Or never left Earth's orbit in the first place.
Hello? she tried to say. But the croak just gurgled in her throat.
She saw that someone had disassembled the pod. Computer boards chained by ribbon cable were spread on a metallic table. A glowing hose linked the array into the wall with colored lights. It looked like a servicing. Or maintenance. Had something gone wrong?
She cleared her throat again. Tried to loosen her stiff vocal cords. But another sound pulled her attention to the other side of the room before she tried to speak again.
A flash of light exploded, and her body stiffened.
A raspy sound like rubbing rocks and sand approached. And a hum. Almost musical.
Two shapes were converging on the pod.
She would have screamed if she could've broken the paralysis.
Especially when they touched her.
On to Part 8.
Back to Part 6.
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11 comments:
The machinery taken apart? That was concise and well delivered back trail. I could see the various components still working but laid out well studied. Her coming back to consciousness was well done also, I was able to see her move from amniotic state back to the world of air and light.
spooky and not snubbing attention. great. keep going.
Walking Man, thanks for the feedback! I'm glad those elements lifted the scene.
Raj, more will start falling into place soon.
I love the way you describe her coming back to consciousness...it feels much more disoriented than "normal" sleep.
Ditto; her slow return to consciousness is disorientated and the tension builds well.
I've only just joined the series. Read part 1 to 7 now. It's great! So where's the next bit???!
Laurel, I'm glad that came across well and believable!
Terri, I'm sure reading them in order is better than waiting. :) I'm getting the feeling that I'm overloading on SEED, so perhaps I'll post the last handful of parts on Mondays, or something like that.
your audience awaits... we are at your mercy ;-)
Reading them in one go is certainly more entertaining than waiting for them, but waiting has its own fun. :)
I have a feeling the breaking of the pod has something to with Adam. ;)
Oh my oh my! When ever I read I don't want it to stop! Two shapes approached her? Who? Who? Who? and Why? I want more...NOW!
curiouser and curiouser!!
Terri, thanks. :) I think most of my audience isn't too keen on this one.
Aniket, saving them up for one go isn't a bad idea!
Four Dinners, soon the pieces will contain reveals. Thanks for the patience to get there!
Little Girl Lost, indeed! :)
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