Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Forties Club Finalist #7

The Sky Rained Shoes
by Grey Johnson


What they saw was white light through their eyelids.

They had been tickling each other’s forearms and making jokes about their travel souvenirs. He had bought her a giant Lucite diamond paperweight to make up for the size of her engagement ring. Her gift to him was a bottle stopper with a top like the head of a tropical bird. She liked the color.

What she didn’t like was the single red rose he bought her at the airport. It was cheaply obvious, and she hated whoever it was who generated the myth of one being more romantic than many.

Then their bodies sublimated, into infinite trajectories, and the sky rained shoes, iPod ear buds, empty Coke cans, and that single blanket that no one ever has.

However, the odd forces of non-linear dynamics held their cheap treasures bound. They dropped as one to the forest floor, where they were captured by a diligent bowerbird, trying to woo a mate.


(I live in a small town in the Southeast, where I try to grow flowers. I enjoy losing at cards, and I knit rectangles. Although I don't maintain a blog, it is easy to read my work at http://sixsentences.ning.com/profile/GreyJohnson.)

16 comments:

Oddyoddyo13 said...

LoL Great ideas. :)

JR's Thumbprints said...

"non-linear dynamics" indeed.

Peter Dudley said...

Sad events, written from a sort of detached philosophical perspective. It almost becomes spiritual for me in the way it portrays the cycle of life and death. And the prose is extremely tight. Well done.

Michael Morse said...

I read this twice before understanding what had happened. Then I read it again and enjoyed it even more.

Jade L Blackwater said...

Lovely writing. This piece really carries me along and feels complete.

Teresa Cortez said...

This is one of your finest, Grey. It's stunning.

B. Nagel said...

I love this. Esp. the bowerbird using detritus from a disaster.

pegjet said...

Wonderful allegory on how everything momentous and meaningful in our lives just becomes meaningless building blocks for another life. I really enjoyed this one, and your restrained execution.

Deb Smythe said...

Wow, you caught me by the heartsrings. Wasn't expecting that ending. Nice pacing. Nice writing.

MRMacrum said...

Without bower birds and slugs, everything on earth would just pile up. Life is indeed a circle and you have pointed it out so well.

Dottie (Tink's Place) said...

Hi Grey!

Thoughtful piece, the most precious of gift is the one we never asked for.

Dottie :)

McKoala said...

Fabulous use of detail, especially in the 'sky rained' para.

Vincent Kale said...

Fantastic imagery. The line about the paperweight compensating for the engagement ring really pulled me in. I was invested in the characters by the end of the first paragraph.

Very moving piece. Loved the last sentence.

JaneyV said...

Romantic, sad, pragmatic and beautiful. The image of the sky raining shoes will stay with me a long time.

Laurel said...

This was so romantic. I love the touch of the bowerbird using their treasures to entice a lover of his own.

Powerful and sad without being maudlin. This seemed like a sweet couple with a lot to look forward to.

Meghan said...

A very powerful story.