Sunday, July 17, 2011

Entry #60

The Palace
by Sandra Cormier


The palace was once pink; now it was red.

Pink like the Princess’s sari, glittering like her diamond earrings.

Niya had often graced the covers of magazines, posing with heads of state and polo champions. Now she pressed her bejeweled hand against the glass of her prison while flames reflected the rage of some faceless entity that no longer believed in royalty.

Smoke, the color of Niya’s eye shadow, curled around the magazine covers which her daughter had lovingly framed and arranged along Niya’s bedroom wall.

Her daughter had treasured the pictures almost as much as her pony drawing which had likely already turned to ashes along with her school books and toys.

Her adopted son – her heir – was away at school and would never see his video game collection turn to molten lumps of plastic.

Niya’s almond eyes glittered with tears, which evaporated almost instantly in the dry air. Tears of sadness but not remorse. Tears of love but not guilt.

She heard sirens in the distance. Soon, flashing red lights tore through the gates, like eyes seeking out the flames.

She pressed harder on the glass. It buckled.

Someone loves me, she thought as her pink sari sailed behind her like a comet’s tail.

The palace had once been pink, but now it was red.

26 comments:

Precie said...

Despite all the modern indicators (magazines, sirens, etc.), I feel like there's an ancient quality in the eoman's plight. The first thing that came to my mind was the practice of sati...a kind of political sati. Powerful work. I'm glad inspiration struck you after all.

Katherine Tomlinson said...

Fantastic story.

Cath Barton said...

Interesting take on the prompt. Very visual writing.

j a zobair said...

Beautiful imagery! I love the use of the sari.

M.G. Ainsworth said...

Very relevant. I also love the imagery with the Sari.

Aimee Laine said...

Now she pressed her bejeweled hand against the glass of her prison while flames reflected the rage of some faceless entity that no longer believed in royalty.
That right there sets the tone. It's always 'someone' who disagrees and that 'someone' ruins it for others. Very well done. :)

fairyhedgehog said...

It's a very vivid picture of a moment in time which encompasses a whole backstory. I wanted to know what happened to the son and daughter!

Sandra Cormier said...

You guys wake things up in my brain that I never knew existed. Huzzah to the writing community!

Dottie (Tink's Place) said...

Like a snapshot of a picture in time... and I also wondered why? Flames self inflicted?

Dottie :)

Sandra Cormier said...

Not in this case, Dottie.

Old Kitty said...

How sad!! I really feel for this mother. I feel she's been neglected. I do hope that someone does love her! Take care
x

Aidan Fritz said...

I like the foreignness the story captures. It is a sad story with a sense of hope in the ending.

Stephen Parrish said...

Repeating the first line makes the end powerful.

bluesugarpoet said...

I like the juxtaposition of riches and a prison - that metaphor works on several levels. Nicely done! ~Jana

Jade L Blackwater said...

I find myself wondering if she's torched the palace herself, is preparing to turn from the old and walking toward something new... and I wonder where this character will go next? Intriguing.

jrthumbprints said...

I would've omitted that last line: "The palace had once been pink, but now it was red."

You had the perfect ending at: "Someone loves me, she thought as her pink sari sailed behind her like a comet’s tail."

Still, I mighty fine story & a personal favorite.

Linda Ryan-Harper said...

From the number responses this piece has drawn, I'd say, you're the one on fire Ms. Cormier!

Mikki said...

There's a gorgeous lyricism to this that tugs at the heart and murmurs to the soul. I love your use of metaphor. Excellent work.

Thank you for sharing!

Sandra Cormier said...

Thank you all so much. Your kind comments make me strive harder to improve my writing.

Sarah Hina said...

The images are so vivid and heart-breaking in this, Sandra.

I have to agree with Steve. I liked the repetition of the last line. It contained the piece, but with a double punch.

Apple Ardent Scott said...

Oh, how often we lash out our anger at the wrong targets. This is a great portrait of an innocent victim of "someone's" unrest. Nicely written.

Richard Levangie said...

Sandra—Lovely work! I thoroughly enjoyed the poetry weaving through your prose, and I'm glad to see you here.

Anonymous said...

Touching and sad. My favorite bits: smoke the color of her eye shadow, and the image of her sari flying out behind her.

Wendy said...

Nice imagery. Love the comet's tail line. Sad story, but powerful.

JaneyV said...

Sandra I love the language and the imagery here. That I am rooting for her to be saved from her burning palace shows that you did a fine job of drawing your character too. Very well done indeed.

jason evans said...

The sadness really permeated the piece and defined it. Very well portrayed. Well written!

Congrats on Forties Club!