Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Entry #101

The Last Realization
by Amrita Bhatia


“Jack look out!”

He was running as fast as he could to save himself from another one of her bouts of aggression.

He woke up, sweat trickling down his forehead.

Why did he get the same dream every single night? For once he wanted a good night’s sleep.

As he groped around in the dark he toppled over his toys lying on the floor.

“What’s wrong Jack?? You alright??”

“I’m fine”

“You are sweating Jack; tell me did you get that dream again?”

“Yes”

“Everything’s going to be alright, don’t you worry”

He cuddled in his mothers’ arms, trying to get together the pieces of what seemed like a jigsaw puzzle.

“Tell me why mother? You know it, don’t you?” he said, tears streaming down his cheeks

She finally gave in, “It was a bad day Jack, and you were throwing one of your tantrums, running all around the house and you somehow managed to get out of the front door.

It all came back to him. He was running across the garden lawn, and before he knew it a car’s shrill horn rang through his ears. Then, it was darkness that engulfed him.

“I can see a bright light, mother” he could feel himself rising towards it, and he could see his mother crying and smiling at the same time.

“Now you know Jack, and that’s why I was here waiting for this day so you could finally rest in peace”

If only he had eaten the vegetables……

19 comments:

*~*{Sameera}*~* said...

Awww poor kid!

Well done :)

JR's Thumbprints said...

Kid's throwing tantrums and not eating their vegetables always makes for good conversation.

laughingwolf said...

famous last words... :)

Ÿ∂ Μ Î ŋÎ said...

Amazing piece... :)
Good to see you here, amrita :)

Anonymous said...

Brilliant...the child's confused mind and soul got solace at last....
Rohan

Anonymous said...

Amazing........ :)
The last line is very nicely written.
Loved it.

Anonymous said...

Amazing........ :)
The last line is very nicely written.
Loved it.

Nisha

BernardL said...

You take your eye off of them for an instant... well done.

Margaret said...

It's amazing what can happen if you don't eat your vegatables....

Lovely story...enjoyed it...

Amrita Bhatia said...

Thank you all for your good words.. This is the first time that i have entered the contest and i'm thrilled to see so many people appreciating my effort....
Thanks once again..... :)

Catvibe said...

Nice Amrita, although I didn't want to have such a horrible thing happen to him just because he didn't eat his vegetables!

Prashant Dhanke said...

Such a sad end.

bluesugarpoet said...

Although I was heartbroken at Jack's fate, I love that his mother was there to help him put the last piece of that mixed up jigsaw puzzle into place. Nicely done! - jana

RiverSoul said...

Really feel sorry for that kid. Beautifully written.
Bravo
:)
Do review my story if you've got the time
:)
Story number 86
:)

Sarah Hina said...

Heartbreaking twist, Amrita. His confusion was something only his mother could soothe. I love that you showed the bond between them, in spite of their sorry fate.

And that's some last line. :) Very nicely done!

September said...

oh my. Did the mom do that? It mentioned saving himself from another one of her bouts of aggression. And why that smile and sadness on mom?
I'm a bit confused but loved this.
Very nicely done. I'm just not sure exactly what happened.
Nice to see she was there at the end.

Amrita said...

Thank You Catvibe, Prashant bluesugarpoet, RiverSoul, Sarah and September for your feedback. Didn't think my story would be appreciated so much...

@September: The mother was smiling because her child's soul was stuck between two worlds and was finally set free, and crying because now she could never see him again. And yes the kid got hit by a car, her mom tried to save him but couldn't.. Hope your doubts are cleared now, thanks again for the good words. :)

suren said...

good one....

jason evans said...

Thanks for being a wonderful part of the contest!