Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Entry #94

Early Morning Train Rush
by Tina M


The train reached its final station and everyone on both sides of the platform waited anxiously for the doors to open. For those on the outside, it's to get in and secure a seat, for us on the inside to just get to our next destination.

My watch told me that I have twenty minutes until my first class. If I get to the next train within five minutes, I can probably get to class on time. It's a close call, but I can make it.

There was a whoosh as the doors slid open, and I pushed my way out with the rest of the passengers. It frustrates me to no end that people can't understand that it would be easier if they let the people inside the train go out first before pushing their way in. Once I was free, I walked to the nearest escalator, stepped on it and waited for it to bring me to the top.

Other people from the train got on the escalator and past me, walking up the escalator like it's the stairs. I frowned slightly at their hurry; this is an escalator, not a set of stairs. Surely they can wait for it to bring us all up.

There was a tap on my shoulder. I turned and saw a guy, probably another student, standing behind me. I raised an eyebrow at him. He gave me a slightly embarrassed smile and pointed upwards.

"Miss, the escalator is broken."

21 comments:

*~*{Sameera}*~* said...

That was cute :)

Sometimes,in the rush of daily routine,we fail to notice the obvious!

Lena said...

liked the story. very realistic and yet with a bit of humour.. thats something that might happen in real life, makes us relate to it :)
Well done!

RiverSoul said...

This was an awesome read.
She must be really dim witted
Nicely written
:)
:)
Do read my story too
:)

Watters Edge said...

Now *that* was funny. I'm with your character all along, I feel her frustration. Then I feel her embarrassment at being pissed off at others for what she had actually failed to notice. Not that it's *ever* happened to me :)

BlanyAshwin said...

hahaha.... cool one..... realistic...simple words.....she was definitely blinded.....

Aerin said...

FANTASTIC. Loved this.

laughingwolf said...

students! :P lol

Tina said...

Thanks everyone! This actually happened to me back in college, and I've seen lots of people become a victim of the broken elevator. :D

Meghan said...

"Miss, the escalator is broken."

LOL! I like that ending.

Anonymous said...

Reminds me of something an old friend of mine used to say, "The aheader I try to go the behinder I get."
John McAuley

Sarah Hina said...

This was one of those absurd situations that could only be true. :D I love stories that end with an "aha!" last line.

Nice descriptions of the train commute, too. There's such solitude in the midst of all that rush. Well done! :)

anks said...

:) such a great description and a knock on the head ending... :)

Prashant Dhanke said...

Wow !! This happened to me too. I was the one who tapped :).
Nicely written Tina .This has to be true and yet so funny.

abouttothunder said...

Nice twist. Good depiction of inner tunnelvision.

Catvibe said...

D'OH! Very funny last line. I agree with the sentiment about train doors!

one more believer said...

..thaz a good story.. one that i could surely relate to.. renee #45

sawan said...

hehehehe, lol, that was one beautiful story :) luvd it!

bluesugarpoet said...

Cute story - great last line!

jana

Ÿ∂ Μ Î ŋÎ said...

Hahaha... That was good!! Loved the last line.. :)

September said...

Oh baby! How embarrassing. Loved the ending.
Nice job.

jason evans said...

Thanks for being a wonderful part of the contest!