Thursday, January 07, 2010

Entry #37

Dangerous Games
by Terri


His tall frame appears like a ghost out of the mist. She is startled, though she is expecting him. He has made no more sound than the rustling of leaves in the cool morning breeze. His face looks thinner than last time but no less handsome.

“I brought you chocolate,” she says.

He accepts the luxury, then, “Anything else?”
With Alex, business always comes first.

The papers crackle as she removes them from her breast pocket. She is glad to be rid of them. An eagle circles overhead as if the Führer himself is watching.

“Thank you” he says, always polite. “London thanks you.”

She smiles a half-smile, her head inclined.

“It’s not London I care about.”

For months she has resisted him; for duty, for the Fatherland. Falling in love can be deadly in this dangerous game. She holds her breath, willing his response. The eagle dives out of sight, hunting its prey.

“Karla…”

Alex pulls her to him. He tastes of tobacco and mint. Lost in a sea of warmth and desire, her knees weaken. He eases her to the woodland floor, his kisses obliterating the ugliness of the war.

“Oh, Alex,” she sighs, “Take me back with you when this is all over!”
“Of course, darling,” he whispers, holding her close.

Later, from his safehouse, his communiqué reads:
“EAGLE TURNED. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.”

When the Stormtroopers come they leave nothing behind but his lifeless corpse. Outside, hot tears stain Karla’s cheeks. For duty, for the Fatherland.

41 comments:

Chris Allinotte said...

I loved the atmosphere here. Way to take the prompt and make it your own. The little sensory details brought this to life for me.

Great job.

Sarah Laurenson said...

Yes. Who is really using whom?

Very nicely done.

Selestial said...

To say I enjoyed this piece sounds wrong somehow. It was nicely written, and loved the echo at the end to Karla's earlier thoughts.

Aniket said...

I louvvhh this one. Its so much like the Frederick Forsyth stories.

Loved the way its written too. Little actions, subtly described.

Definitely in my top 5!

pjd said...

A dangerous game indeed. A lot told in a very small space. Well done.

Lena said...

That was indeed well done. Liked how you made it a real story of real people in just 250 words.

Bernita said...

A "bird's eye view" of intended mutual betrayals.

Leatherdykeuk said...

I can see this Owellian vision so well.

Four Dinners said...

I'm with Aniket! Excellent stuff!

Preeti said...

My God. It's beautiful.

And i'm quite surprised that she's crying. She did kill him, right?

Kate said...

Wow, you accomplished a lot in these 250 words! Great, tight plot AND beautifully written.

Meghan said...

Great twist at the end!

JaneyV said...

Terri - so much intrigue, romance and ultimately, betrayal in so few words - that takes some skill. I really like your take on the prompt. Well done.

maybe genius said...

The ending really punched me good. Well done.

Terri said...

Aw, you guys are too kind :-)
@Aniket - I'm more of a Robert Ludlum fan, but thanks!
@Bernita - lol!
@Preeti - She did cause his death, but it doesn't mean she liked doing it. How does one choose between love and country?

Craig said...

Nice twist. Traps within traps.

Chris Eldin said...

THis is like a movie in a paragraph. I had a feeling about the ending. Thoroughly enjoyed this tale. I agree... nice sensory detail.

Aimee Laine said...

One vs. the other with love the conduit. :)

Amias said...

Oh my, the spy world is not all it's cracked up to be, then again, yes it is. Love and betrayal are best friends.

Beth Harar said...

Wasn't expecting the ending at all. Well done!

Kartik said...

Beautiful piece .. one of the best I've read so far. You should write spy novels! :)

laughingwolf said...

love a great twist!

kashers said...

Intriguing take. Had to read three times to get the full picture, but then deadly games take some understanding I guess.

austere said...

Very nice. Fluid writing, too.

Charmaine said...

Someone once said, "You must kill the thing you love."

It must have been a man that said that. Oscar Wilde...or someone.

I don't think it's true.

Very moving.

Laurel said...

Wow. More than one cool twist here. She's serving someone horrible and evil but thinks she's doing the right thing. Her conviction is so great she brings about the death of someone she loves.

Shudder.

catvibe said...

Oooh, a little treachery I didn't see coming! Nice job.

Tara said...

Had chills ll the way through. Did not see the endig coming at all. Really great!

Jimmie Vee said...

Not much of a "safehouse", was it? I enjoyed the setting of this story, and the complicating factors of love during war, betrayal, and chocolate. This was entertaining but light, with enough information infused to build a coherent story. Two villains, no winners - wonderful!

Jared said...

i kept reading this saying "there's something i just... hmmm..." then i realized: i was just angry with these people you created. you really conjure some vivid characters.

truevoid said...

had to read it twice to understand it completely. beautiful.

Anonymous said...

What a wonderful twist. An excellent story in so few words.

J. Randick

angel said...

Nice one Terri!

Jean Ann Williams said...

Wonder if this happened often during the wars?

Written very well.

Jean Ann

Rabid Fox said...

A nice blend of romance, betrayal, and heartbreak. Too bad about the word limit, as this one could stand to be fleshed out more.

David Barber said...

A great piece Terri. Great detailing and imagery. Loved it.

james r tomlinson said...

I'd say those birds were a foreshadow of the tragic events to come.

Deb Smythe said...

A tale of love and betrayal, well-told. Loved the twist ending.

Aerin said...

Dear Entrants #1-105,

I have read your pieces so that I can fairly participate in the Readers' Choice vote. (I read all of them through last week, before I started commenting.) I will be coming back around to offer my keep/tweak comment, but I didn't want anyone to snark.

Cheers,
Aerin (#236)

BTW, it's perfectly fine if you still want to snark, but this way you can choose a more appropriate subject, like the new Starbucks paninis or the people over 35 who are exclusively on MySpace

desiderata said...

terri: well done wit' d twist.
Let's Twist Again although in my country there's no summer. I'm chubby, no checker:) Desi

Catherine said...

Terri, it's fab and didn't see the end coming, what a great twist...

Catherine - Haarlem