Sunday, January 10, 2010

Entry #91

A Rictameter
by Logicus Tracticus


That's all
I wish to be
Floating on high so free.
Like birds swim in blue sky above
It would be wonderful floating in space
Hover where, eagles dare to go
Over mountains skimming
Top of the earth
That's all

21 comments:

Preeti said...

Short, simple, uncomplicated and nice.
:-)

it is indeed very difficult to write such verses. simplicity in authoring (ironically) is the most difficult skill to imbibe. but you seem to have done it really well. :-)

Bernita said...

"That's all"?
Wish it wasn't.

pjd said...

'twould be wonderful indeed

Lena said...

That is nice indeed. Way too short to my taste but beautiful nevertheless.

Ayodele Morocco-Clarke said...

Short...sharp and to the point.

JaneyV said...

Logicus - you have just proven the old addage that "the best prizes come in small packages."

Lovely.

Craig said...

No trouble in getting your point across with minimal words.

Aniket said...

Who needs a 250 when you can say it all in 40?

I liked the fact that you didn't stretch the piece at the cost of its integrity. It still stands mighty.

Loved the structure and flow of the piece.

Sarah Laurenson said...

What a great structure. Love the symmetry of this. Very well done.

Scribblers Inc said...

This just kicks it...oh yes. kicks it atleast by a mile!! :D

Mithun Mukherjee.

Meghan said...

What a lovely piece! Great job.

Patsy said...

You make it seem such a reasonable request that I almost feel this desire is achievable.

Lovely poem.

laughingwolf said...

free to be...

Laurel said...

Soaring. Nice.

Four Dinners said...

I'm with Bernita.

It was so good I wanted more...but maybe that's it eh? Leave 'em wanting more?

I'm no expert on poetry - to put it mildly - but, short and sweet as it is - I could read poems like this all day!

BlanyAshwin said...

Sexy symmetry....

Stephanie Green said...

Love that the poem itself is a silhouette of a bird- delightful!

Chris Eldin said...

Short but sweet!

james r. tomlinson said...

Inspiration comes in many forms: short and long.

catvibe said...

I'll bet this piece looks gorgeous formatted in the center instead of left justified. Very lovely little piece here.

Aerin said...

Dear Entrants #1-105,

I have read your pieces so that I can fairly participate in the Readers' Choice vote. (I read all of them through last week, before I started commenting.) I will be coming back around to offer my keep/tweak comment, but I didn't want anyone to snark.

Cheers,
Aerin (#236)

BTW, it's perfectly fine if you still want to snark, but this way you can choose a more appropriate subject, like the Golden Globes or those wretched Old Navy dummies.